Why is it that its been a month and it feels worse now than last month?Maybe the numbness is wearing off?Whatever the case I have to get my sister off my mind I feel like Im going crazy or something. I just cant stop thinking about her.I havent even got my christmas cards out yet.I cant believe christmas is next week.My mother in law tells me that she is happy now in a beautiful place and everytime im thinking of her Im calling her back because shes worried about me and that I should stop doing that what? I dont understand.I wish it was that easy there were just so many things left unsaid how do I ever find closure?Any advice ? Ive been going for walks every day but I dont even want to go out in the stores or anything I dont kow why but I dont want to be around a lot of people right now.I usually love to go out shopping i use to do it just so I could be around people cuz Im a stay out home mom and it does get lonely at times.Usually i keep myself busy enough with housework and all but right now all that just seems so petty. I use to obsess about everything maybe too much.I know theres no majic cure for this I wish there was for all of us going through this pain.I just need  to find a way to stop thinking about her and i guess not feel guilty about it.Is this part of the grieving process Is anybody else going through the same thing?