My Fiance died on April 27 of this year.  I found him dead on his boat.  It's been only a little over 2 months.  I miss him every day and I long for him.  I don't cry everyday anymore but I still cry.  The past few days have been difficult.  I have been busy with many social events.  I think the reason why it has been hard is because at these social events there have been couples (holding hands and looking happy)  This only reminds me of how lonely I am without him.  And although I go about my day, I come home and he is not there. I can't call him during the day to say I love you our just simply hearing his voice.   I feel sad and depressed. I just want to stay home and be sad and cry and talk to him. And that is exactly what I did today.   They say grief are like the waves of the ocean.  right now the ocean is really rocky/choppy.

I am thankful for this website. This is a place I can come to when I have days that are bad because although I have people who are supportive they can't relate because they have not been through what I am going through. And I don't want to be a burden or a downer.

I miss him so much it hurts.

Thanks for listening