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Comment by Karen R. on February 8, 2012 at 10:05pm

Dear Brenda, what can I say to thank you?!  Your compassion and words of encouragement mean so much.  I have been dwelling on what you said, that this is a journey and NOT my destination. And you are so right, it is a blessing that I can express my feelings to this group because it is so difficult and often impossible to do so with my close family and friends.....including my own children, who just worry about me and want me to "STOP". Thank you also for the website that you listed. Trust me, I wish I could get one of your hugs, I'll take any and all!

Comment by Karen R. on February 8, 2012 at 9:56pm

Dear Grace, thanks for your support and i am saddened that you can relate.  Wow, you heard your son's heart beat?: ) What did that feel like? Every time I get close to wanting to meet the young man, I just can't get up the courage to do it. Hopefully one day I will.......sooner than later I hope. I recieve mail from the Organ Donor Society or whatever its called, all the time but I just rip it up and throw it away. It's like I can't even read it.  I really don't like feeling this way, I'm just a mess. I am sure that the family of my son's recipient have been nothing but estatic with the help he recieved and rightfully so. Once again thanks for all the love and support.......many hugs!

Comment by Robin Jone on February 8, 2012 at 9:34pm

I feel so sad when I read how there are so many of us who are hurting so badly. I still can't seem to totally grasp that Zach is not coming home to me again. I have a brother, who has COPD and is an organ donor receipient. I know how very greatful we were to the family who donated their son's lungs so that my brother could live. He has a daughter and a grandson, and for him to be able to be there for them for however many more years he has, is such a blessing. My brother's wife was killed in a car accident when she was only 31, their children were only 5 and 2 at the time. So for my niece to be able to still have her dad is truly a gift. My son died they tell me instantly and totally broken, I wish we could have been able to have a part of him somewhere helping someone. What a wonderful gift some have you have been able to gift to another family. As someone who has a family member who has been a recipient, I thank all of you who have been able to do that to help someone else. My heart is so filled with sadness, don't know how to fill the hole. Hugs to all.. Robin

 

Comment by Stephanie on February 8, 2012 at 12:56pm

karen i hope i didnt offend u by asking? only with all my love from my heart, cos we were in the same situation. dick, u are a wonderful caring man - never think emotions are not manly. about the crackling voice, i thought i was the only one who experienced that - no one has been able to tell me what it is. also with the "cycling", sometimes my voice just is so crackly.

Comment by Adrianne Edgerly on February 8, 2012 at 1:17am

Dick
I too go from numb to grieving. Today was all grieving. I don't believe you need to be more manly when it comes to grief. I admire your love for your son.

Comment by Dick on February 7, 2012 at 11:56pm

Compassionate Friend meeting tomorrow and I am looking forward to it.

Comment by Dick on February 7, 2012 at 11:51pm

I go from numb to grieving, cycling each day. Something sets me off, I cannot put my finger on it. I just miss him greatly.

When I grieve, my voice crackles and I shed a tear. I should be more manly about the whole thing, this bothers me as well.

Comment by Dick on February 7, 2012 at 11:47pm

Everyone, Danny was a donor unknown to me. They called on the day of his death to harvest organs, I refused. I found he was a donor when going through his effects later. I wish I had known. :(

Comment by Stephanie on February 7, 2012 at 2:13pm

hi karen, i'm not aware of the whole thing with your son... what had happened that the docs said there was nothing more they could do for him?  being an organ donor, were they suggesting that now was the time, as he wasnt going to make it anyway? love steph xx

Comment by Rosie Fletcher on February 7, 2012 at 1:51pm

Adrianne, you are not alone in this thinking.  Since my son passed, I have been reading books about life after death.  I like the one by James Van Praagh on 'Growing Up in Heaven'.  I've also have met with several mediums which provided comfort to me.  I do believe there is a heaven that loves all people regardless of their religion.  No judgement, just love there.  I believe in my heart that my son Sam is with family who have passed on.  I believe that he has made new friends there and is going to school.  I believe that he is pursuing his music and I also believe that he still comes to give me signs when I am at my saddest days.  This belief, keeps me going.  Knowing he's ok there and that one day I'll be with him again.  But I am also aware that I miss him terribly everyday and wish he was here with his family on earth.  Hugs to you all.  My heart is heavy today.

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