Comment

Comment by Stephanie on March 20, 2012 at 2:09am

anne, as hard as this is for you, i am very proud of you, that you are being "gentle" with yourself.  your comments, like it is what it is, or when the time is right, etc, shows that you are being accepting of the way YOU feel, and that is a very positive step to take.  and i know we all agree with you 100%.  as you are ready, so be it.  this is something more painful than anything in the world. and probably the only way to deal with the pain is to be gentle with ourselves.

Comment by Adrianne Edgerly on March 20, 2012 at 2:02am

Karen
I understand how you feel. My boy has been gone 7 months. I don't want to deal with this pain for years upon years. I really don't understand what this is all about. This thing we call life. Hugs to you.

Comment by Karen R. on March 19, 2012 at 8:35pm

Does anyone else ever feel like me? It is so difficult for me to say, write, type or even imagine how long it's been since my son passed away/crossed over. I think acknowledging the period of time that he has been gone, only fuels my anger and sadness because I don't want any of this to be real. For me, it's like saying he passed away/crossed over, means it really happened and I can't fix it. I feel like my mind and body are still in shock. My son passed away 2 1/2 yrs ago..........whew!!!! I can't believe that my son has been placed in his final resting place!!! Somebody help me!!!!! My heart is pounding as I write this.  How can time possibly ease my pain?!! How, when each passing day reminds me that the world is going on without my son. I can't talk to any of my close friends or family about my feelings. I was asked if I would ever move out of state like I once wanted to but now, the answer is a big fat NO!!  How could I ever leave my baby here, who would take care of his final resting place and his memorial site at the intersection where this tragedy began like I do, no one cares enough.

Comment by Rosie Fletcher on March 19, 2012 at 8:35pm

Agree, so glad you're doing ok Dick.  Hugs to everyone.  Have been struggling this week and it's only Monday.  Missing you Sam so much today.   Hope next week will be better.

Comment by Karen R. on March 19, 2012 at 8:03pm

Hey Dick, relieved to learn that you are "ok", you know what I mean. I was really worried about you. I know how hard it is counting the months that go by. I remember when I counted the hours, days, weeks after my son passed away and now to my disbelief, it has turned to years!  It still feels like hours ago.

Comment by Adrianne Edgerly on March 19, 2012 at 12:55am

Dick
I'm glad you are ok. I know our sons died just 3 days apart so I thought of you and Daniel.

Comment by Adrianne Edgerly on March 19, 2012 at 12:53am

Anne
That had to be so hard. I pray it will get easier. I keep trying to look at my sons pictures everyday and I try as much as I can to listen to his voicemail. When I don't it hurts even harder to look at the pictures. Or hear his voice. Maybe it will get a bit easier each time you go. I pray this for you.

Comment by anne on March 18, 2012 at 11:30pm

Today I went to the farm. I abandoned it when Ben died. It looks terrible. I feel very bad that I have left it alone for so long. It needs lots of work to get it livable again. I couldnt bear the thought of being there anymore so I bought a house in town and I just left the farm. All of the pictures, and all of the things we used to be, just sitting there. At first I cried when I walked in the door and then all the memories of life the way it used to be just came flooding in. I went down the basement jwhere the boys room used to be, and all of Bens army stuff was just laying there on the bed. I couldnt breathe. For a moment I couldnt move. I decided It was time to take one room at a time and give myself time to get through this project. I have doone this so many times before and I never get to the part where I get things cleaned up and gone through. I guess it is what it is. I did stay out there longer than I have before so thats a good start. It dosnt matter how long our children that have died are gone. When I come across all of their things for a little while I go back to when the worst thing thats ever happened is my daughters prize winning cow got into the pig feed and died. That was awful and tragic, but the death of my  child  was just unimagineable. Life was so innoccent then. My heart was so innoccent then. Overwhelming terribly overwhelming. All of it gets so overwhelming. I was thinking about how deep Ive had to dig within myself. Not by choice for sure. Sometimes I thought I would suffocate. That how I feel when I go to the farm. I guess its time to fight a battle ive been putting off for a long time. Im going to give a good try and if I cant well then I guess it will just have to wait until the time is right.

Comment by Dick on March 18, 2012 at 10:45pm

I am OK everyone. My 7 months came and went on the 14th.

Comment by Karen R. on March 18, 2012 at 7:28pm

Just want to say that I feel so connected to all of you guys, I know that there are many other online sites such as this but this one has something that always draws me here.......it could only be you guys. Thanks for not judging me. Sending many, many hugs to you all.

• ‹ Previous
• 1
• …
• 625
• 626
• 627
• 628
• 629
• …
• 757
• Next ›
• Page