Comment

Comment by lynne thompson on June 2, 2012 at 2:27pm

Thank you , Robin, I know it is so hard to do this alone.   I wish we all lived in the same neighborhood where we could all be together and talk about our children and still can go home when we want not to talk anymore......that would be so nice......But better still would be if all our children could talk to us again, but this is reality and sometimes it is just unfair......period

 

Comment by Robin Jone on June 2, 2012 at 11:18am

Haven't had a chance to get on the last few days. Grace, I am so sorry you are not getting the much needed support you so well deserve. You know we are here for you, wish we could be there physically. I feel exactly how you all have said, my two faces. The mask I wear during the day when I am at work, the I'm doing okay face, and then the one where when I come home I can allow myself to feel and cry and scream or whatever I need to do. That is one reason why I still attend the Compassionate Friends meeting. That is my one time a month where I bring Zach's picture, and can talk about him, cry about him and miss him in front of people who aren't going to tell me to be strong. That it is okay to let it out. I went through the thing where I blamed God, but one day I was at church and my minister was talking about that sometimes we make bad choices. In Zach's case, that was very true. His accident would not have happened if he didn't make the decision to get too close to the end of the cliff to see the waterfall. When I realized that, for myself, I quit being mad at God, and unfortunately got mad at Zach. It still makes me so angry. It hit me really hard the other day, I was cleaning my family room, and had to pick up Zach's ashes to dust. I felt like, "how f***ed!!! up is this! Sorry, but that is how I felt, he is suppose to be here, enjoying the summer with us. Playing Marco Polo in the pool, having cook outs and picnics. Sometimes life just really sucks. I know I have to go on for myself, and all my other loved ones who are left. It will never be easy, but sometimes I have times where I have actually been able to laugh again. Unfortunately, I still haven't gotten oven that when that happens I feel guilty, and wonder how I can laugh when I no longer have my son. I do know that Zach would want me to be happy, and have fun. That was what Zach was all about. Big hugs and prayers to all of you my friends. Robin

Comment by Ammy on June 2, 2012 at 9:36am

 Adrianne ... (¯`v´¯) 
                 `*.¸.*.♥ 

Comment by Adrianne Edgerly on June 2, 2012 at 2:09am

So long now since I saw him last.

Comment by Karen R. on May 31, 2012 at 8:07pm

Hello Grace,  please remember that my self and other members will always be willing to listen, sorry we can only send cyber hugs. This is all so awful.

Comment by Grace on May 31, 2012 at 8:48am

Hi all....  These past few (3) Years have thrown me for a true Loop...My Family seems to have abandoned me in my grief... Brother saying I should have aborted my Autistic Son Niles... My Mother sitting in silence is like an agreement to me... mY other Siblings have not really been there for comfort.... and My 2 other children have grown.... My husband and I have had "Issues" where I feel like he is not really here Emotionally for me either... it is like EVERYONE expects me to be "STRONG"  yes we all have heard that.... Yet I AM NOT STRONG....like they think and I TOO NEED some serious Emotional Support.... and feel so alone in the world.  My faith in the people I have THOUGHT  I could lean on at this time has abandoned me. 

It is hard to trust or believe in anything... GOD or the Family that is supposed to be the closest to you. 

I smile and put on the act...like we all do.... But inside... I feel like a totally abandoned Child in a deep pit.   I really do not Trust or have Faith in anyone or anything.... 

Comment by Karen R. on May 31, 2012 at 7:45am

Ammy, you described how I feel exactly......2 different people. That's me for sure. I find it to be frustrating to act like I'm "OKAY" in front of some people just because my mourning makes them uncomfortable. I must admit I still don't do well with covering it up for people.  I guess that's why I prefer to outwardly grieve alone, even though there are many times when I need a hug while I'm sobbing uncontrollably.

Comment by Ammy on May 31, 2012 at 7:28am

Hugs back Grace & to all others.  My thoughts exactly Grace ... another day.

Grace, not to get into any deep faith talk, I do understand how you feel about God.  I think we all go through that.  How could God allow such a thing to happen?  I feel I am fortunate in that I have found answers and peace as far as God is concerned.  I don't blame Him anymore.  I hope you can find this peace too.  At least it's something in this mess of a life to hold on to.

Sending prayers and hugs.

Comment by Grace on May 31, 2012 at 5:30am

((((HUGS)))))  another Day...

Comment by Dick on May 31, 2012 at 12:31am

Adrianne go through the motions. Sorry, we must.

• ‹ Previous
• 1
• …
• 596
• 597
• 598
• 599
• 600
• …
• 757
• Next ›
• Page