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Comment by Adrianne Edgerly on August 16, 2012 at 11:36pm

Remembering this night last year. Sad. Nervous about tomorrow. Miss my son.

Comment by Michelle W on August 15, 2012 at 1:25pm

Adrianne... I hope Friday goes well for you ... Please know my thoughts will be with you on this hard day...

Comment by Grace on August 15, 2012 at 5:38am

Adrianne... I hope you have PEACE Friday..... I really don't know what to say... it has been 3 years for me but all of the "Firsts" are so hard.

 

PEACE To you, Dick and Others having your "Firsts"  

Comment by Adrianne Edgerly on August 14, 2012 at 7:47pm

I'm happy to hear it went better than I think you expected. My day is Friday. I'm very nervous.

Comment by Ammy on August 14, 2012 at 7:37pm

Dick, I am happy to hear that your day went okay.  It sounds like it was a loving time of remembrance for you and the family. You were in my thoughts throughout the day, and prayers were said for you and your family.  No day is really easy, but the special days are a little harder.  I pray blessings & peace for you and all of us here.

Comment by Dick on August 14, 2012 at 5:00pm

It was nice today. I will post pictures when my brother in law gives them to me. We had the vigil at the church around his bench, about 20 ppl including my relatives and church members. The pastor said a prayer and we threw roses into the pond after saying our peace. 

His ex-GF texted us support. I really wish she was my daughter-in-law, I love her.

I went with my wife to pick my mother up. We all went to the gravesite and placed flowers and played "Danny" by Elton John. We all lost it. We sat there talking about Danny for about an hour and then we went home. I kissed the marker.

In about 30 minutes, the wife and I will leave for a support group tonight. I will probably go to Compassionate Friends tomorrow night.

All in all, a nice but painful day.

Comment by Adrianne Edgerly on August 14, 2012 at 1:53am

I will keep you and your family in my mind, heart and prayers today Dick. My son's first year gone is this Friday. We will never wake with a light heart again.

Comment by Michelle W on August 13, 2012 at 5:54pm

Dick,
My prayers and thoughts are with you, your family and you beautiful son Danny...big hugs

Comment by Grace on August 13, 2012 at 1:06pm

Sherry... you know it is now how we all see how random our lives are.... as you say.... in an instant our lives have changed.  and we are so NOT in Control....  it is hard to admit that there really is nothing we can control.... this... the weather.... and just random tragic events.  If she did not know it was coming it could be what everyone says is a "Blessing"...... And the one who dies from cancer we say has time to "Say Good bye" and resolve unfinished business ...so That is a "Blessing"     BUT the curse is SUDDENLY has no chance to say "Good Bye" and the Long Linger and Suffering is that of the one that Does.....

Any event we still miss them terribly..... and in the end we are empty and left wanting them.

 

Saturday was the "Benefit" I hold to honor my son and to give money to other families still living with a special Need.... It was one of the easier ones to plan.... the 4th one....and the sun was shining... great food, entertainment.... but such low attendance.... I was discouraged... does anyone even care about this mission any more or do they think maybe I should just "GO ON" and stop this Memorial Fund?  I could not control the weather or if anyone would come.

So I can somewhat understand how Dick feels about staying private.... it protects ones self from seein the world go on with out them.

But then one of the Special Guest went into the race car pits and came out with a smile ear to ear and was so happy that I arranged this event.  His guardian looks at me and says.... (Can I Cry?) Happy that someone made her grandson so happy.....  I said.... "Can I Cry?"  because even though this whole event would be said to have been a "FLOP" this year.... a couple of my "Special Guests" had a great day.... so Maybe I need to find a better way of looking at this?    As I go into my work today A(Sheltered Workshop for the Disabled) We decided that these folks are having a "Company Picnic" with all the left over food from the benefit..... OK  My Mission of doing "Random Acts Of Kindness" WILL Continue..... This 4th Annual IS a SUCCESS!

Comment by Sherry Ray on August 13, 2012 at 12:11pm

 I know how you all feel. I wake up each day and stay to myself this is just a bad dream. I ache to hear her voice and long to hold her. Just to hear the words mom I needed to hear your voice because I'm having a bad day. On the worst of days she could smile and everything would seem better. I remember holding my granddaughter for the first and only time and saw so much of her mother. It wasn't supposed to be this way. She wanted to be a mother so bad. This was going to be my first grandchild and I was so excited. What is really hard is that I spoke to her a couple of hours before I got the call. She was having a good day and she was at work on her break. She was talking about Harley kicking and squirming and how she was craving a cheeseburger. After a few moments of just hey mom just wanted to say hi and I love you, I will talk to you tomorrow, she was gone. She never knew what happened. She had a pulmanary embolism (blood clot to the heart). I feel guilt everyday that I wasn't there like I could put a bandage on it and make it all go away. Prayers and hugs to all and please remember to keep me in your prayers also.    

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