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Comment by Michelle W on October 9, 2012 at 2:01pm

Stephanie,
My son had a my space page if you search Billy Waldo you can see his page I have really no control on it but my daughter has his password and stuff and updates new pictures and events if we every had any.,, it is a nice place for friends to leave thoughts and messages for him,, I feel closer to him to go read the postings sometimes.,,, you should go check it out of course be prepared he was alive when this was set up and did die with may people posting on that day they all saw the accident it was a school event.., but it keeps him alive(:.,,, that makes me happy.,,,

Comment by Stephanie on October 9, 2012 at 10:44am

guys i have panic also something terrible, my anxiety became so bad, i went to a dr recently, he put me on some meds. i can truly say it has helped me tremendously.  there are still times when the anxiety seeps in and i'm sure you know it is NOT EASY to overcome it that easily. i wish i could carve her name into a wooden objec - but what object? or i saw these beautiful crystal blocks, where they can use a foto of her and put it in - beautiful, but bit expensive; or -- i don't know, that's for US, but how to not let people forget her. maybe get a blog page for her.... ?

Comment by Grace on October 9, 2012 at 5:49am

I think it has been so hard to have my older kids grow up so fast... I feel like I need someone to nurture... and they do not want it ....my daughter is 23 and my son is 20..... it has been 3 years... but I still want to hold on tight to them... I know I need to let them spread thier wings... but I have the urge to hold on and be protective....  My Niles needed me so much and now it seems like the house is so empty.   I feel that panic feeling too... Michelle.  it has been like the whole house was emptied at once.... even though they both live here... they are hardly ever home and we barely bump in to each other let alone talk or do anything together... except for the benefit.  Our life revolved around Niles now it is like we have spun away from the center.

Comment by Michelle W on October 9, 2012 at 12:26am

Stephanie,
I also lbe the quilt idea.., not there yet but my son had a teeshirt for everything..., we also have a scholarship at the high school in his name that we will keep going.,,, I have been getting extremely panicy no sleep again like when the accident happened ..,,do I too hate the holidays 11/26 will be a year oh and to put the cherry on the cake my daughter is moving back out this week just like last year when the accident happened oh a month earlier,,,, I will let you know any new thoughts on the day.,,,my daughter is trying to help in this matter .,,,hug to all..,don't you think the hug is just perfect on that hard day..,,

Comment by Stephanie on October 8, 2012 at 2:20pm

Comment by Stephanie on October 8, 2012 at 2:19pm

wat appropriate words for our feelings....

 

Comment by Grace on October 8, 2012 at 1:40pm

My husband and I are a singing duet... there is a Brandi Carlise song called "The Story"  I can relate to it as a line says:  "All of these Lines across my face tell you the story of who I am.......  (Another verse) You See the Smile that's on my Mouth...it's hiding the words that don't come out..... and All of my friends who think that I'm Blessed .... They Don't know MY head is a Mess... No they don't know who I really am and they don't know what I've been through like you do.... and I was made for you..."   Yeah we all where our Happy Face mask almost every day.

Comment by Stephanie on October 8, 2012 at 1:02pm

Sophia, u really r not alone, i know we all put on that brave face... no one can begin to imagine our feelings. maybe talk to ur son's dad, maybe it wd be good for u. maybe it's time. hang in x x x x

Comment by Stephanie on October 8, 2012 at 1:00pm

GRACE i know exactly wat ur saying. many people - altho not exactly in those words - i think thought that my life would be more "back to normal" without now havin a special needs child. bless her, she took up every living moment of my life. and of all things my life is CERTAINLY NOT MORE NORMAL!!!  i know the silence of their not being there. it's hard, so hard

Comment by Stephanie on October 8, 2012 at 12:58pm

KAREN, i had to smile reading yr post cos that's exactly what i do. i put her pics up, then i take them down, then i put her shirt in my closet, then i change it to my dresser, then into a bag, then the pics up again, all depending on my emotions. i'm sure people think i'm crazy, but at least i know i'm not alone - we just know A DIFFERENT NORMAL xxxx

 

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