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Comment by Jane P on August 13, 2013 at 5:57pm

People don't know what to say to people like us, they are not in our shoes. So they say things that are so wrong. If I didn't cry, I would explode. Crying is painful but necessary.

My doctor told me today that my tears are full of the love we have for our child. Since our love is never ending, so are our tears.

Comment by Ammy on August 13, 2013 at 4:37pm

Teresa, do not feel pressured into parting with your son's jerseys.  Take your time.  His friend(s) will understand.  I learned this the hard way and now regret our hastiness in not keeping all of my son's belongings.  Even now when I think about letting someone have something I hesitate, and as long as there is hesitation they will not leave.  When the time is right I know I will feel comfortable with it.

I hope today has not been overwhelming and that you have been able to remember that we are here and thinking of you.  Hugs. 

Comment by Ammy on August 13, 2013 at 4:31pm

Thinking of everyone as the day here is coming to another end.  Granddaughter has just left and the little grandson is taking a nap.

 So quiet.  I'd rather have the distractions at times because the quietness allows my mind to go to those places I want to avoid (my loss) and then on your losses as well.  Our mind can become our prison - especially with grief.  

My hope is that I've helped give some hope with some of the things I write.  I am not qualified to know what may help since I am not in your individual shoes.  But I so wish to help you feel better, and yet I know we all have the same loss but we may grieve differently.  

If I ever say anything that is upsetting to any one of you, please let me know.  It is not my intention to deepen your hurt, but to give you hope for a gentler day to come.  I cannot take awake your pain, and I know promises that it will get better sound too unbelievable for you right now.  (Sigh)

As always...in my prayers.  

Comment by Grace on August 13, 2013 at 12:18pm

Photographs and Memories.... these are all I have to remember you by.....  remember that song.. . wow looking at your photographs.... then cleaning and re-arranging bedrooms for a gal to come live here with her 4 year old... she has not been here since before Niles died.... her daughter is just turning 4.... born after Niles died... then as I declutter...there are those photographs and memories... kindergarten... this age that age.... flood with tears even though it has been 4 years and almost 3 months.... how can I see a 4 year old...listen to the cartoons that he watched... ?  Before He died... After he Died....  Photographs and Memories..... Ghosts have come for a visit.... well at least they are surfacing..... I hope I can be ok with this kid coming to live with me....

Comment by Vasanthi S on August 13, 2013 at 11:24am

Michelle, I left a message for Bonnie too--I do hope she gets here n shares. Ammy pls take care... Berna Milt, how are you doing? this question is an odd one to ask I know, but when asked here i don't resent it-- anyone else asking me this makes me unable to answer truthfully... So Berna, that's how I mean it-- I hope and pray that you have some support system .love.

Comment by Ammy on August 13, 2013 at 11:17am

Teresa, I share the 14th with you even though you are in the early stages it was one of the first thoughts I had this morning - "Oh, tomorrow will be 37 months, I am going into another year".  Shed a few tears and prayed.  I know how hard it is for you and my heart is with you.  (((Hug)))

Comment by Ammy on August 13, 2013 at 11:05am

Sorry Michelle, I don't know Bonnie well.  Have left her a message, but we will just have to pray that she responds and that she is holding up.

A hug to all.

Comment by Jane P on August 13, 2013 at 10:59am

Thank you Michelle, you are so kind.

I don't know Bonnie. Perhaps she's on holidays?

Comment by Michelle H on August 13, 2013 at 10:37am

Has anyone heard from Bonnie Jacobs? I'm concerned that she hasn't been posting...

Comment by Michelle H on August 13, 2013 at 10:27am

Jane, I feel such a sense of relief to know that you went to the doctor and you're willing to take medication to help you through this. That shows a real strength on your part and a great deal of love on your husband's. We moms are so used to being strong for everyone else, sometimes to our own detriment. When we need help, we are wise to do what we would have no trouble encouraging a loved one to do.

I, too, find the people on here to be my lifeline. I check often throughout the day for new posts and I'm always grateful when there are some. I feel like all of you are my friends, just as Vasanthi has said. I go to The Compassionate Friends support group once a month, but having 24/7 support available makes all the difference.

Remember, you GIVE as much as you get, Jane. We need you as much as you need us.

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