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Comment by Grace on September 18, 2013 at 4:59pm

ok.... My overwhelming situation with my mother who has been estranged since she and my brother told me that I should have had an abortion instead of having my 14 year old Niles who died in 2009..... I have tried to extend an "Olive Branch" time and time again.... seeking some apology but today the bitterness surfaced again from her.... while she is preparing to be transferred to a nursing home.... I guess she will go to her grave bitter and never seeing how hurtful and hateful she has been.... Pity....Pity... But I do not think I can repair this relationship... and I am still sooo hurt by the way she and my brother and father treated my son.... before while he was alive but the hateful things said since his death......

Comment by anne on September 18, 2013 at 4:29pm

To all who are hurting xtra today (((hugs to you)))). We are here for you.

Comment by Michelle H on September 18, 2013 at 11:50am

Teresa, praying for you on this most difficult day.

Vasanthi, I'm so glad Craig is with you and got to experience the rainbows with you.

Marilyn, you are such a gift to others even in the midst of your own pain.

Comment by Vasanthi S on September 18, 2013 at 7:32am

Teresa...hugsssss.. am with u , Marilyn thank you for that wonderful little verse..put in on Micks fb page...Marilyn, I don't know what is a double rainbow--just saw the one i put up here and it spanned the tableland, the area i was driving to-- it was soooooo needed as I was so so so low and sad... yes where r u my sweet child, why did u just leave me here to struggle on without u?

Comment by Teresa D. on September 18, 2013 at 6:31am

I'm hugging you Marilyn. 

Today's date is 9/18/13 yet I'm stuck on 9/18/2012 the day I received the worst call of my life.  Today I feel just like you Marilyn. 

Comment by Teresa D. on September 18, 2013 at 5:50am

One year ago today I received the worse phone call of my life.  Nothing more I can say.

Grace, Just letting you know I'm here to...listen for you too.

Vasanthi that is your rainbow. That was Mick letting you know he is with you and he wants you to be happy.

 

Comment by Vasanthi S on September 17, 2013 at 9:14pm

Dawn Opfer..am here for you.... do write more and we are listening and it wil help as you share more to know that you are understood..

yesterday I missed Micks most terribly. Craig was busy with the computer and in the morning I went out to the market... it brought back memories of being with Micks when he was small..the tableland here in the hills is a place where Micks used to cycle around and when he was even smaller we both used to slide on the same slide with me holding his hand- where is my baby?I would have shared all the new happenings in my life with him and he would have been so encouraging as I was with him... even if all else went wrong we had each other,,, o I know that Craig understands but he didnt know micks n didn't know me as a mother,,, I hesitate to keep talking about Shreyas esp when he himself was having a weird kind of day in a new country...on the way to the tableland I suddenly saw a rainbow and I told Criag,'look all on ogs keep talking of rainbows and here's ome-- what does it mean? he said,'it means its a sign from ur loved ones'.. i said ,'yes but what precisely cd it be?' he didnt know so u all here pls tell me.. im attaching a pic of the rainbow here--it made me feel better and lifted my spirits,,,Mickuuuuuu mummy loves you and misses u terribly,

Comment by Grace on September 17, 2013 at 5:48am

I am just posting that I am here..... listening

Comment by Teresa D. on September 16, 2013 at 9:44pm

I know I bare my soul here.  I read and I cry with many of you.  Lately I'm emotionally going through it.  I start my day right here.  If there was an "agree" button I'd hit it everyday. It's nice to know you do know how I feel.  You understand my roller coaster emotions. Right now I'm not ready to tell my mom how upset she is making me but I can say it here.  I've been struggling with how to handle my cousins situation with the support of everyone. You guys get the date thing.  Marilyn I know your atruggling but just know I live the way you describe your journeys.

Connie thank you for letting me know it's ok to be "selfish" if that is what we are. 

Vasthani I too expeience an overwhelming sense of fear.  I don't know why when the worst has happened.  I don't know what it is I'm so afraid of these days.

Connie, Dick, Grace Mary and anyone else I'm not metioning you are all important to me and you are all apart of my healing.

 

Just to let you know I decided to go to the viewing and not the funeral. I can stay in the back and lean on a friend and if it gets to much for me I can slip out the door. I want to be there for Jessy but I need to take care of me too.  Since Saturday I have been an emotional mess so this could change.  

Comment by anne on September 16, 2013 at 9:33pm

I too feel like we are all friends. The things I post, and blog on here I could never say to anyone else. This is the place to find listening ears, and open hearts.

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