Comment

Comment by Michelle W on December 29, 2013 at 12:25am

I haven't been in for awhile but my thoughts and heart is with all of you.. Another holiday has passed without my beautiful son.. And of course I am the only person who feel as I so... Everyone think loading my son is like a break up you should be over this now... I wish they all could understand or even care they don't .. It's not their fault life for them isn't gone or changed life just goes on... And me my daughter the most beautiful spark of hope wrote in my Christmas card.... Mom, I know you're a big holiday person anymore but I appreciate you pretending for me. I hope you like your gift I picked it out special (: I love you and know how much I appriciate how much you do for me. Ok and then I took her and her new boy friend to dinner and she mentioned to please smile that I gave a permanent bitch face now... I try to put up a front it is just so hard ... My New Years resolution to be as fake as possible so people will not avoid me, make me uncomfortable , or make me cry uncontrollably ...I do have a horrible look on my face my son was taken away forever and the holidays I lived to get my children the gift of their drams ever year now I just feel sad... Why can't anyone understand why doesn't anyone want to talk about the most important person I knew... Why can't anyone ask how I feel or really even care... It breaks my heart to see new post at the group... How much pain over and over... I can't find that ok place yet I know they say it gets easier well I guess no one took away their seventeen year son.. For just going to support there stupid school ... Not many people die for school spirit... I hope everyone has had a peaceful Christmas... Yeah ... It's over

Comment by Teresa D. on December 27, 2013 at 6:29pm

Judy I would encourage you to visit your mother, if for anything your self.

Judy it doesn't matter how you lost your son, it's still the greatest loss a parent can experience. Your pain is no less then any one else.

Michelle, sometimes I do the same thing.  I make it through and then melt down when it's over and I'm alone.  I did it yesterday.  All the way to the tournament I wanted to melt but I didn't.  I made it through the day with a smile but at the end of the day on my way home and once I was home, I cried.  I guess it is a release.  And the beginning steps to managing the pain.

Vasanthi & Michelle, I'm guilty of that too.

 

Comment by Vasanthi S on December 27, 2013 at 1:54pm

Teresa so nice that you could feel Micheal's presence through it all.. Michelle, I have felt the same many times when a certain person, the way they carry themselves or a smile brings back memories.. I once was walking in a busy marketplace in Mumbai and suddenly a tall young man was keeping step with me. For a second I fell back to the times I used to scurry to keep pace with my long legged son.. then I shook myself out of that , looked up at the tall boy walking next to me and smiled and let him go on..an aching heart all the way back and tears for something that will now never be .. how painful and poignant are these experiences.. hugsss ..I still feel better knowing that we are all in this together.. Judy what a rough time you are having..maybe it would be a nice thing to contact your mother while keeping in mind that you are doing so not for changes from her but so that you know you reached out and grew in stature by doing so.. all my prayers for you..

Connie.. how are you doing? do let us know.

Havent heard from Jane too or Bern..

Dolly is BO ok and how are you? Is the ringing in your ears better? Here we have a new visitor.. a guinea pig who is with us while his owners have gone for a holiday..Love watching Craig with Sparkles the Guinea pig and Tiger our cat.. he is so gentle and loving and the animals seem to understand this and kind of relax with him..Everyone please take care and again thanks for all the love .xoxoxox

love to everyone

Comment by Michelle H on December 27, 2013 at 1:38pm

Judy, I'm sorry to hear about all the sadnesses in your family. How do you feel about contacting your mom?

Comment by Ammy on December 27, 2013 at 1:17pm

Judy, I am so sorry you are having such a hard time.  I do pray that things ease up for you shortly.  We definitely need those little breaks to carry us through and through and through it all again.

Hugs to everyone.

Comment by Judy Edwards on December 27, 2013 at 9:28am

The days between October 29 till Feb. 19 are all our birthdays that my mom ,mine my nephew, my niece, oldest grandson my son,
My youngest grandson, my partner and brother....I also lost a aunt this week and found out my mom has congested Heart failure and my mom and I are not speaking are having anything to do with one another so I don't know how to handle this situation. Thanks again I knew I was forgetting something. Thank my friends Judy

Comment by Judy Edwards on December 27, 2013 at 9:20am

Ip

Comment by Judy Edwards on December 27, 2013 at 9:15am

Hello all. I sure you thought I'd given up on the group not so.
The last 2 1/2 months have been the hardest months I've gone through so far. See my entire family start Oct.29 and finish up Feb 19th.

My son 6 month passing date came and 3 days later I lost my Animal of 13 years. Which just compound the pain. I laid in bed 5 days and cried a river. My partner got me up made me shower and took to a movie. I had to pull to gather somehow my oldest grandson birthday was nov.17. I pull it off. I over did it because of him losing his father.
Dec 1 hit and back to bed I went all I was doing was breathing air and wasting space. On the third of December it was my son 33 birthday. Oh I was dying in side. I stayed in bed this time about 8 days then I knew again I had to pull it together because my youngest grandson had his 3 rd birthday again I went way over board. I could return to zombie land because there mom had me and their papa take to a party. For needy family's so I made through that. However I finally got my son death certificate. It stated he passed of a meth overdose so again I've gone to the bottom of the of the pit. And some how this weekend I've got be happy no tears because we are having Christmas with my boys. So no I haven't gone away I just been a useless human. Trying to put one foot in front of the others..I hope your Christmas were nice, merry Christmas to all my friends. And a Happy new year if I don't get back till a little after the first hugs and kisses to all thank for listening

Comment by Adrianne Edgerly on December 27, 2013 at 2:20am

Teresa
Good for you! Such an intense show of love for your son!

Comment by Michelle H on December 26, 2013 at 10:33pm

Teresa, what a wonderful tribute to your son! You must be very proud of what you accomplished--at least you should be. It was a great photo of the kids playing, having a wonderful time.

I had a meltdown Christmas Eve after 6 o'clock mass. I sat behind a young adult man who, from the back and profile, reminded me of Chris. He was about the same height and had a reddish beard and was a big guy as Chris was at various times in his life. I kept it together during mass, but as soon as I got in the car, I broke down and sobbed. I guess I really needed to, as I know I've kept things bottled up.

I'm glad Christmas is over and I'm equally glad we all made it through, one way or another. Blessings to each of you and hopes for a New Year with more peace and comfort.

• ‹ Previous
• 1
• …
• 370
• 371
• 372
• 373
• 374
• …
• 757
• Next ›
• Page