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Comment by Vasanthi S on January 8, 2014 at 7:57pm

All this about going through it.. is there any choice? even if we think we are stuck, we really aren't as like it or not one goes through it- It can't be avoided, unless one knocks oneself senseless.. every thing else, starting from shock, despair, anger, guilt, avoidance of the fact etc is also 'going through' it , isn't it?..xoxoxox

Davi, don't even think of burdening yourself with what others think.. some will think and say this, some that, don't worry about it as only you will know that the days ahead some days when you feel you are coping will be the best days we have. Other days will be a downslide.. we are all there and we are with you..

Comment by anne on January 8, 2014 at 7:50pm

It's all that dang grief. You can't go around it. You can't go under it. You just have to go through it.

Grief is a thief. It steals all of your todays by making you dread tomorrow. All we really have is today. Today is all anyone has, and there's no reason to worry about tomorrow. God is already there. Peace to all

Comment by Teresa D. on January 8, 2014 at 5:39pm

Davi, Connie's right.  Only you know what you can and can not do. 

I'm sorry your joining us. We all walk together just at different paces.

Comment by Connie K on January 8, 2014 at 12:57pm

Davi, only you know the pace at which you can grieve. Your loss is so new, that you are still in shock and just want the grief to go away and have your child and your life back.  Each day will be different, sometimes each hour or minute. You should not add to your pain by feeling guilty  about any expectations of how or how fast you will grieve. You have the right and the need to feel just how you feel. Wishing you peace today.

Comment by Davi Burford on January 8, 2014 at 10:11am

I am having a hard time with guilt its has been 1 month since I lost my 16 yr. old to a tragic accident. part of me feels like if i move forward to fast people will say oh my didn't you just lose your son, and then I feel like i am not moving on fast enough for work and the people who need me right now. I just don't know what to do. I know there is no set rules as to how this is supposed to go

Comment by Vasanthi S on January 8, 2014 at 7:54am

Difficult to fake a happy face when you are dying bit by bit every day. Connie thanks for you and all here for the understanding.  (((((( ))))))

Comment by Teresa D. on January 8, 2014 at 6:08am

I have the sad face. How are we suppose to look?  I AM SAD! VERY SAD!

Dolly, great pictures!

Comment by Michelle W on January 8, 2014 at 3:30am

Thank you Adrianne but everyday I feel strong but also I feel myself hiding away from everyone because the truth is they just don't understand or care anymore.. So I feel so much more alone by the day...that is why I find myself drawn to all of you...I feel your pain....

Comment by Adrianne Edgerly on January 8, 2014 at 2:43am

Michelle
You aren't alone. I think we are all faking it. Be kinder to yourself. Yes, we understand your pain. It is not one day at a time it's one breath at a time.

Comment by Michelle W on January 8, 2014 at 1:10am

To all...I feel your pain continuously and always think about you all I try to fake my way through all the time infact I feel sometimes I loose myself in the lie.. So my next thought is please tell how you do this daily.... I was the super mom, the wife and the fun person to be around,,, now people don't understand so I fake it the best I can... But at Christmas when my daughter,
the boyfriend and myself eat dinner at a restaurant she mentioned that I should have a dinner cocktail... She thought my might loose the bitch face that I now have ... You know there permanently unhappy face you just can't fake... So my question to all because I know you all understand my pain and how it's like a dark shadow that never leaves....has anyone had success with a coucelor or therapist.. I don't want to take drugs but I fell maybe if someone had insight on a better way to do this... I need that help.. I don't have that support team most people have my son ironically was my support team always and we'll you he's gone...and people are not beating down my door to listen or help... Don't you know... I have bitch face... My husband seem to be a lot better and me not so much... Please any insight I would love the advise ...I have just lost my soft side and I guess I want my son to look down at me and say .. Yeah that's my mom saving the world still..instead of there is my mom hating the world..hugs to all(even from a stranger a hug just make things better for a minute)

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