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Comment by Jesse's Mom on March 24, 2014 at 4:11pm

And so angry that my son died because of a totally reckless driver who should not have been on the road. She had no insurance, had been cited for other driving issues...

She was the "lone bullet" on the road that day...as this is a very quiet route normally where my son was driving...he was driving on his motorcyle on his way to a doctor's appt. when she came into his lane...I had to read in the paper that she did not even "realize she hit a person" right after the accident...that is how dense this person is...

...I also had to learn from the paper that he "flinched" before the accident...so he knew what was coming at him...

 

Comment by Jesse's Mom on March 24, 2014 at 4:01pm

Been reading the comments from all of you...

I was wondering...something I am having difficulty with...I found that I feel unable to be around certain people (friends and such) from before my child passed simply because their children are still here. I do not wish anything bad for them, but the reminder of not having my son here is simply overwhelming...and to see others continue on their life it has become a marker of some type in my mind...

 

Also, I have been having to be more careful of what I say around my daughter regarding her brother's death...she seems to not be able to handle the grief and is suffering from intense anxiety attacks...yet I find myself "stuffing" it all until I can be alone...it is frustrating.

I am so mad this is my life... 

Comment by Jane P on March 23, 2014 at 6:45pm

Our grief is our child, just different. But still very close.

Comment by Jane P on March 23, 2014 at 6:43pm

Dolly

No..............There is no way to get over it. It will "live" with us for the rest of our lives. And when we grieve, we love them more.

Comment by Michelle H on March 23, 2014 at 6:40pm

Dolly, sadly no, there is no getting OVER this, for if there were, it would mean we didn't love like we do. We can, slowly but surely, get THROUGH it, definitely a changed person forever. I'm sorry your need to see Brandon is going unfulfilled and causing such anxiety. I pray that Brandon will show himself to you in a way you KNOW it's him.

Comment by Grace on March 23, 2014 at 9:26am

I agree..... there is no pill or really nothing that can FIX Grief..... you just go through the process.... you live through the pain.... and little by little, you see a ray of light and hope.... then you fall backward only to pick yourself up to go a little further.....

Comment by Teresa D. on March 23, 2014 at 8:30am

Michelle I'm so happy for you that your gathering gave you so much comfort.  It is so nice to hear that it was a celebration of Chris's life. 

Connie, I hope your drum circle is able to do the same for you.  I just love that idea.   I think Lynn and I can tell you, as you head into it the anxiety is there but once the event happens I hope you are able to feel the love and comfort that our events brought to us.  

Comment by Lynn Williams on March 22, 2014 at 4:25pm

Michele it is so wonderful that your friends were with you to celebrate Chris's life. Connie your drum circle sounds inspiring and I am sure Daniel will be right beside you the whole time. Teresa having help with grief can only help. I have been seeing a grief counselor for 6 months and she has helped me understand my feelings and given me ways to help cope when the waves come. Hugs to everyone.

Comment by Connie K on March 22, 2014 at 2:54pm

Michele, I am so happy and proud of you for celebrating and honoring your son's life with your loved ones. I hope for the same next weekend when we do our drum circle. But it really is SO har5d getting to that day. I feel like sleeping until then.

Teresa - I think seeing a counselor over meds is the way to go. At least then you can determine if it's something you really need. I occasionally take and anti-anxiety pill to help me deal with difficult situations but no pill can fix this.

Comment by Michelle H on March 22, 2014 at 11:15am

Thank you for your kind thoughts regarding yesterday. I went to Mass in the morning and then kept busy getting House and food ready for the friends who came over to support me on Chris' first anniversary. We had snacks and got a great start on the remembrance scrapbook. Then we watched a wonderful DVD documentary on the afterlife narrated by Bill Curtis. It ended up being a day of celebrating Chris more than grieving him. I'm blessed with these wonderful friends whom I have known since high school and college. I'm blessed, too, with your support. Thank you!

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