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Comment by Connie K on March 28, 2014 at 10:18am

Thank you everyone for your support. It really means so much.

Lynn hope your tulips and daffys come up !!

Comment by Michelle H on March 28, 2014 at 9:36am

Connie, thinking especially of you and Daniel this weekend.

Comment by Jane P on March 28, 2014 at 8:19am

Connie's words hit the nail on the head, for me.

We have been raised to believe each day we have is "precious", which it is.

But you're so right when you ask "how can we do this with such heavy hearts?"

Perhaps the phrase is not meant for bereaved parents.

Comment by Teresa D. on March 28, 2014 at 5:50am

Lynn, I bet that is the most beautiful hydrangea tree anyone has ever seen. 

Connie, I know the bitter sweet feeling you felt when you saw those shirts.  Hopefully the thought of "Kung fu chicken" warms your heart.  HAPPY BIRTHDAY DANIEL!!!!!!!

Vasanthi, what a pleasant mix up the other day. 

Comment by Lynn Williams on March 27, 2014 at 10:24pm

Connie thinking about your plans for Daniel's birthday this weekend. It will be a joyous occasion for him and all his family and Friends to be together to celebrate his continued life. It is so unbearably hard to not see their laughter and feel their touch, but the memories and honoring their being is what can still bring us joy and hope. We love them and they love us forever no one can take that away. Seven months ago when Kyra died I never thought I would still be alive to see the spring come again. Life will never be the same for me again but I am looking forward to seeing my
tulips and daffodils bloom again. Four years ago she gave me a hydrangea tree for Mother's Day which has flowered every year in my garden. She will not be with me this year to give me a hug but her tree will remind me of her beauty and love. Thank all of you for being here. Many hugs to share..

Comment by Connie K on March 27, 2014 at 3:25pm

We had tee shirts made to give to Daniel's friends with some original artwork on it from when he was about 9 years old, - he was so funny - it was "Kung -Fu Chicken". Then his "DKAPS" signature on the front that he did during his last year. They came today and they made me smile then sent me into the tailspin. But I know he is smiling too and his friends will love them.

Comment by Connie K on March 27, 2014 at 3:20pm

The thing that is really upsetting me this week as we approach Daniel's birthday is that this is a beautiful world and life, filled with people we love and who help us and beauty in nature that awes us. And we were on a road with our lives, creating and living what we hoped would be a wonderful life for our children. Even though I believe Daniel is safe with Spirit and lives on, I don't understand it or where he is. So it still just makes me so sad that it all ends for us - everything here. And I hope and pray that as our souls move on, it is also beautiful - more than we can know. But I don't want everything to end here. The thought of losing someone else significant in my life overwhelms me. The thought of living with this pain til I die overwhelms me. It is just TOO SAD TOO SAD. Why can't I feel the peace that faith is supposed to bring? I am feeling  so crushed with grief. almost more now than before. I want him back and to have the things in life that are so special - a love of his life, children, creating work he loved. I don't want everything I love to go away from here. Vasanthi - our lesson may be to live each day to the fullest and always give your love, but ironically how do we do that with such heavy hearts?

Sorry I'm rambling...  just a really tough one. I am going to see a wonderful spiritual healer today because I feel like I just want to get in bed and not ever get out

Comment by Michelle H on March 27, 2014 at 1:52pm

Connie, sending you peace and love as you get ready for your drum circle. Adrianne, wishing you lovely dreams of your son. Vasanthi, don't give up, please.

Comment by Vasanthi S on March 27, 2014 at 12:50pm

Been reading everything..L R, Teresa, Connie, Dolly, Michelle, Adrianne, Davi how i wish I could lessen this grief.. while we feel connected to our darling children when we grieve I know that I am trying to find a way to connect through peace too... It happens that when I firmly decide to sit quietly in front of an altar or any corner n tell myself that I will allow for peace to pervade me and not grief as grief is this alien thing eating me up, sometimes I am successful, sometimes though I desperately want the past with my son in it, and wonder why the hell am I living on, what can be so compelling which snatches away ones very life itself and leaves the other to twitch in despair and helplessness? what possible lesson can there be?we are supposed to learn what?

i give up! but xoxoxoxox and hugssss to all here 

Comment by Connie K on March 27, 2014 at 12:01pm

Oh Adrianne I wish I could answer the whys and the what ifs. Sometimes we don't see the signs they leave for us because of all the pain. Maybe your son is there in other ways. Peace to you and everyone today - sending all the love and hope I can

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