Comment

Comment by Connie K on January 27, 2015 at 3:48pm

Thanks everyone.

Comment by Marie on January 27, 2015 at 3:30pm

I forgot say happy birthday, Connie. I hope you get a little peace today!

Comment by kim on January 27, 2015 at 2:12pm

connie, I know today  your b day sucks , I hope you can hear Daniel saying it to you, holding you and singing. hugs to you and have a good day.  kim

Comment by Teresa D. on January 27, 2015 at 1:56pm

Connie it is totally understandable why you need to withdraw right now.  Your day must have been emotionally draining.  I bet your right and Daniel was right there holding you up.  But now you need to drop the fake face and process it all.

I hope in your silence you can hear Daniel, saying HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM...I LOVE YOU!

Daniel helped you find that poem as a gift to you.

Comment by Sandy Hendrix on January 27, 2015 at 1:54pm

Oh I am sorry Connie, forgot to say Happy Birthday.. x0

Comment by Michelle H on January 27, 2015 at 1:37pm

Only have a moment, but Happy Birthday, Connie.

Comment by Sandy Hendrix on January 27, 2015 at 12:26pm

That's really nice Connie.  I also am sorry you are having such a hard time.  I feel the same way.  We all seem to be suffering more these last days.  Many hugs and love.

Comment by Marie on January 27, 2015 at 11:29am

Connie,

That is such a beautiful poem. What a gift to have found that. I am sorry it is so hard what you are going through. I will say a prayer for you today. You have such good words of wisdom. I have book club tonight, and I am so tired and my house is a complete disaster. I told my daughter I wanted to skip it, but she says I should go. I think I wear myself trying to keep my mind busy. Then I crash and my family thinks I am crazy...Anyway, sorry to go on when you're having to go through what you are today. Many hugs and prayers!

Comment by Connie K on January 27, 2015 at 11:16am

I'd like to share this poem my son wrote. I came across it looking through papers for the deposition.:

A Silhouette Of a Rising Sun

by Daniel Kaplan

A silhouette of a rising son

As clear as day itself

But still a mystery

Nothing to hear but my thoughts

Nothing to see but my mind

A silhouette of a rising sun

When I am truly me.

Comment by Connie K on January 27, 2015 at 11:12am

Thanks for your support everyone. Yesterday was brutal. I hope and pray that it doesn't go to trial and that we can get safety changes made without dragging it out and everyone through it for too long. It really exhausted me and made me go over every regret and  I ever had. They go through his whole life, I guess to determine what his "worth" would have been. Immeasurable, that's his worth.

Linda I know how you feel, even after 2 years, I need solitude. Sometimes a lot, sometimes not, but we need time to process our grief without any judgement, about it, good or bad. Today is my birthday and several friends and my husband asked me to have lunch, do something fun, celebrate. I turned them all down. After yesterday, I don't want to make small talk and I don't want to pretend and I don't even want to talk about the Daniel and the accident to anyone who doesn't really get it. I want my son back, I want him to him me that sweet hug and say "Happy Birthday Mom, I love you". And I hear him say that and it gives me strength and hope - but we all know it's not the same. But I will tell you that I know with certainly that he was with me yesterday and a few times I thought I was going to break down, I feel spirit keeping me centered and true to the cause (and I beg-prayed like crazy). I haven't always made the right choices but through it all my intention was to do what I thought was the best thing for my son. The battle is forgiving myself for things that may have I wish I could go back and do-over.  Each day I strive to do that more and more and now I hope that with what's left of my life, I can do something he would be proud of. Until then, today I choose solitude with the beautiful day so I can feel him close. But I also know that I need my friends so I'll keep my heart open.

Thank you all for being here. I just don't know anyway else to be able to express my feelings wholly and w/o judgement. My love and prayers go out to each and every one of you. Remember even when we are alone, we have each other.

• ‹ Previous
• 1
• …
• 190
• 191
• 192
• 193
• 194
• …
• 757
• Next ›
• Page