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Comment by Rj on April 12, 2015 at 5:09pm

Sundays seem to last forever. I remember when larry was still here, we would meet up or he'd come to my house. We would spend half the day together and then i would dread monday because i wasnt ready for the weekend to end. Things have changed in so msny ways. I lost him on a sunday so those are my worst days, plus i am ready to get to work, just so i can have some distraction for 9 hours out of the day. Going back thursday was good, was worn out since i was off for two months. It will take awhile get my stamina back up but at least i am getting out, off the couch, drowning in grief. It is a scary place, easy to find comfort in depression. Larry was lively and so positive i know he would not want me to get stuck in that condition. The ache tho, no matter what i am doing is right there...still so painful

Comment by Connie K on April 12, 2015 at 4:49pm

Sheri please do not feel guilty. It is so hard to know how to navigate these waters. We are so often blind sided by comments and questions and the rage of emotions inside just have no where to go. I have answered the same way as you did in the past if I knew it was someone I would never see again and didn't want to deal with it. But that didn't work for me. It's all a learning process. You'll know in your heart what is the right thing to say and it may be different some days. It doesn't change the love between you and your child one bit. Just don't worry about how it may make others feel...  you have enough to deal with. And I''ll tell you one thing, you will find out who will be a support for you now in your life and who won't. Choose to be with those who can support you, listen when you need to vent and just be with you when you need peace and quiet. lots of love and prayers to you and everyone.

Comment by Rj on April 12, 2015 at 11:51am

Sheri...be easy and gentle with yourself. We are learning day by day just how to manage our pain and grief. Let that go, it is just a tiny thing compared to what we must face for rhe rest of our lives. Xoxo

Comment by Dolly on April 12, 2015 at 10:12am

I usually say I have four children...three are here with me and one is in heaven with God... but not everyone believes in heaven or God so some people don't like that answer.. but too bad.. its what I believe and I don't really care all that much what anyone thinks .... at least about that subject.. its personal and its what it is.. my truth is my truth and if they don't like it they can not ask me again.. I've lost all patience with having to explain anything to anybody I'm afraid.. I just don't think anyone who hasn't lost their child has a clue .. some keep telling me how much they miss their children who live a far distance away from them and I just want to clobber them when they do that.. but I know they just don't know and I'm not supposed to clobber them, and really am supposed to love them .. so I hide alot too.. just to avoid the whole dang explanation thing...

Comment by Teresa D. on April 12, 2015 at 9:11am

Michael will always be my son. I still struggle with this question.  I don't want to have to explain it and I don't want the sad looks when I say, "Michael is not here".  But sometimes at my own fault I end up having to say it.  I then just try to keep a smile and move the conversation on. 

Comment by Connie K on April 11, 2015 at 2:20pm

I have found lots of new places to go - when I don't feel like talking I avoid!! Good answer Rj

Comment by Rj on April 11, 2015 at 10:59am

I went to a new place to have my hair done, just do not want to go back to some places where people know, dont want to talk about it to people who are not close to me. The woman was talking about her kids and asked if i had children....i knew it would come up, i just said yes i have one wonderful son, he is 27, the light of my life snd just chsnged the subject. That will always be my answer from this day forward.

Comment by Connie K on April 11, 2015 at 10:55am

Yes it is hard when you are asked that question. I dread it. But I have learned to answer honestly. Daniel was my my only child so it just doesn't feel right at all saying I have no children because I am a mother! I still am a mother. So I say that I have 1 son who has unfortunately passed. Most people respond with compassion. And those who don't have food for thought and usually then will become interested in Daniel's life. This is life  and Death is a part of life. I think the more people can talk about it and accept it will just bring about more understanding and love between us all. And I appreciate people asking questions about my sweet angel because that's what I really want to talk about. Oh what a rocky road this is. Just so hard. I feel so grateful for the support of everyone here. Love and prayers to you all.

Comment by Sharon on April 11, 2015 at 7:16am

Sheri it's so hard. Sometimes it's easier to just say two because then there is no need to explain which will bring up the tears. But, we feel guilty because we do not want to ignore our children that passed... Like they've never existed. It's hard and painful whichever way you respond.

Comment by Rj on April 9, 2015 at 6:10pm

It did me good, i was drowning in my grief, mourning and depression in my living room. I prayed and talked to larry on the way in to watch over me and give me the strength just to get thru the day. Oh what a hole he left

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