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Comment by Rj on April 12, 2015 at 11:51am

Sheri...be easy and gentle with yourself. We are learning day by day just how to manage our pain and grief. Let that go, it is just a tiny thing compared to what we must face for rhe rest of our lives. Xoxo

Comment by Dolly on April 12, 2015 at 10:12am

I usually say I have four children...three are here with me and one is in heaven with God... but not everyone believes in heaven or God so some people don't like that answer.. but too bad.. its what I believe and I don't really care all that much what anyone thinks .... at least about that subject.. its personal and its what it is.. my truth is my truth and if they don't like it they can not ask me again.. I've lost all patience with having to explain anything to anybody I'm afraid.. I just don't think anyone who hasn't lost their child has a clue .. some keep telling me how much they miss their children who live a far distance away from them and I just want to clobber them when they do that.. but I know they just don't know and I'm not supposed to clobber them, and really am supposed to love them .. so I hide alot too.. just to avoid the whole dang explanation thing...

Comment by Teresa D. on April 12, 2015 at 9:11am

Michael will always be my son. I still struggle with this question.  I don't want to have to explain it and I don't want the sad looks when I say, "Michael is not here".  But sometimes at my own fault I end up having to say it.  I then just try to keep a smile and move the conversation on. 

Comment by Connie K on April 11, 2015 at 2:20pm

I have found lots of new places to go - when I don't feel like talking I avoid!! Good answer Rj

Comment by Rj on April 11, 2015 at 10:59am

I went to a new place to have my hair done, just do not want to go back to some places where people know, dont want to talk about it to people who are not close to me. The woman was talking about her kids and asked if i had children....i knew it would come up, i just said yes i have one wonderful son, he is 27, the light of my life snd just chsnged the subject. That will always be my answer from this day forward.

Comment by Connie K on April 11, 2015 at 10:55am

Yes it is hard when you are asked that question. I dread it. But I have learned to answer honestly. Daniel was my my only child so it just doesn't feel right at all saying I have no children because I am a mother! I still am a mother. So I say that I have 1 son who has unfortunately passed. Most people respond with compassion. And those who don't have food for thought and usually then will become interested in Daniel's life. This is life  and Death is a part of life. I think the more people can talk about it and accept it will just bring about more understanding and love between us all. And I appreciate people asking questions about my sweet angel because that's what I really want to talk about. Oh what a rocky road this is. Just so hard. I feel so grateful for the support of everyone here. Love and prayers to you all.

Comment by Sharon on April 11, 2015 at 7:16am

Sheri it's so hard. Sometimes it's easier to just say two because then there is no need to explain which will bring up the tears. But, we feel guilty because we do not want to ignore our children that passed... Like they've never existed. It's hard and painful whichever way you respond.

Comment by Rj on April 9, 2015 at 6:10pm

It did me good, i was drowning in my grief, mourning and depression in my living room. I prayed and talked to larry on the way in to watch over me and give me the strength just to get thru the day. Oh what a hole he left

Comment by Sharon on April 9, 2015 at 5:59pm

Rj - Im so glad that work went well today. I think that I actually do better on the days that I work too.  Meltdowns will be normal, I have them too. I just go run into the bathroom. I have learned to always have Kleenex with me because I never know when they will hit. I'm just so tired of being sad and crying. My eyes are tired, my whole body is tired...

Connie, thank you for your love and prayers. You are right, it is not normal to bury your child. The heartache just never leaves us...

Comment by Rj on April 9, 2015 at 5:45pm

May we all find some way to cope...well work whooped my butt today, tired, first day back since losing larry 2/1. I was met with such genuine and gentle kindness. Has a few small meltdowns. I did better than what i thought i would.

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