Lost wife

i lost my wife Katherine after 3 months of battle with cancer on dec 28/17.  We are to young for this, she was 36 and I’m 41.  We have 4 kids between 12-17. She was one of a kind person.  We were each other’s true love and bye both knew it.  Her passing has left a big void in our family. A big part of me died with her.  I used to miss her even when I went to work and now it’s tearing me apart.  Me and Kat always thought if one of us were to go it would bye me, I have a higher chance of it. Never once did we think it would bye her. Now I feel like this world is upside down and screwed up because she passed.  We were trying to get her out of this problem and we lost... big time.  I miss her sooo much and I’m so lonely. I used to go to her about everything and now I can’t.  I feel like I failed her.  I’m expected to protect her and I couldn’t this time when she needed it the most.  Love you Katherine always. 

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Permalink Reply by Jon-Paul Ackerman on January 10, 2018 at 9:47am

Ron and Kathy how are you guys!? Much love! I wonder what Our Wives are doing right now lol They sure know what we're doing lol So Ron, I relate to your feelings and you're doing much better than I was. But you're wrong about not being able to go to Her for everything... you can. The intimacy and love is stronger than before. It is terrible and unfortunate we can't be sexual with the body we're so used to but we can still seduce Them mentally. It's hard to balance a life here and pay Her all your attention so be patient with yourSelf. I'm here and I love you both. 

Permalink Reply by Dawn W on January 10, 2018 at 5:39pm

Hi Ronald

i am so sorry.  So very sorry for your loss

i lost my husband to Esophageal cancer on Nov 12 , 2017

he was diagnosed in July2017

it spread to his brain in September..and then complications continued

i feel you pain to see your other half go through the struggle and not beat the monster (cancer)

i cry...I lay in bed..I get out of bed..

nothing changes the deep pain

what I can share is that even with my concrete boots of grief on my feet..and facing a full blown hurricane wind..

i can now get out of bed..I am trying to carry him with me as I find a new normal

i do restorative yoga once a week now...hit the treadmill at home and  going to try a new kickboxing workout studio next week

I am finding exercise..whether walking or yoga ..clears my fog and allows me some hope

i am a grandmother and find my young grandchildren give me strength too..he told me I neede to stay to be here for them..

so I take them in ..smile..hugs and all

kids help ..even when offering a hug and a tissue 

hold on

grieve...face the wind ..hug your kids

know

you are not alone

blessings and strength

Dawn

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