Comment

Comment by Jayne on September 17, 2012 at 12:27am

I miss my mom so much. why is the pain so bad?

Comment by Kim Phillips on September 16, 2012 at 1:37pm

Glad he was with you and you made it through.  Yes you can be surrounded by a lot of people but still feel very very alone. 

hugs and blessings

 

Comment by Peggy Henry on September 16, 2012 at 1:12pm

thanks for your concerns.  made i through the weekend with smiles and helping hands for my son.  it was a beautiful day.  funny thing i heard mike's voice during the events, so hhe was with us.  but ever feel completely alone in a crowd.

 

Comment by Dennis C. on September 14, 2012 at 7:00am

Mark,

First sorry for the delay.

I am glad that you said everything that you said. And really, if the truth be told, a lot of people feel the way that you do. And for good reason.

Here is a quote that has had a tremendous impact on my thinking.

    “ If you look for truth, you may find comfort in the end; if you look for comfort you will not get either comfort or truth only soft soap and wishful thinking to begin, and in the end, despair. ” 

This was said by C.S. Lewis a famed author and lecturer. And I agree with him.

The thing is, there are so many beliefs about life, death, God, etc., that one hardly knows what to believe. And at a time of great grief tends to allow the lies about such things to fuel their anger at something, or someone. Especially is this true when we believe that this something, or someone could have changed the outcome but did not.

I believe that their is TRUTH about God that helps us understand ( no blind mystery faith can truly help us). Understanding brings us comfort.

There are answers, there is TRUTH, they will comfort (comfort does NOT take our pain away) just as Mr Lewis said. We just need to keep learning until we find TRUTH.

Who really is God?
Why does he allow the suffering we see?
Is there a purpose to all of this?
Is there a greater cause that can invigorate us and comfort us?

People are seen as heros who die for a greater cause.

We can truly find the answers to these questions, the truth to all of this. And then we will find COMFORT.

Comment by Debbie S on September 13, 2012 at 11:33pm

Oh Peggy I know how you feel. My daughter's wedding was 3.5 months after the passing of my husband (her stepdad). That was so hard!! I keep praying rhings will get a little better but 6 months later and I hurt worse. I don't know what to do. I'm going to therapy but even that takes every ounce of energy I have. He was my rock. Always here for me no matter what. I need him so bad right now!! I've cried so much you would think I wouldn't be able to anymore. I just want to crawl in bed and stay!!!

Comment by Mary M. on September 13, 2012 at 5:55pm

Hi Peggy,  A friend of mine recently celebrated his son's wedding without his wife at his side and he said it was a really hard day for him.  So know that we are all praying and sending hugs your way .. and hopefully family will realize how much you are hurting even while celebrating and give you those extra hugs and love you deserve.  Take care.

Comment by Angel on September 13, 2012 at 5:53pm

Peggy..I had a little more time than you but not much...my youngest daughter..got married last November and my husband had passed the March before ..so 8 months..we planned a funeral and a wedding at the same time so I understand....I did good...I knew he loved us both and was happy for her...it was exhausting..but I smiled and circulated for her...it was a beautiful wedding and day...try to make it the same for you...I will say a prayer foryou and keep you in my thoughts....PEACE!

Comment by anna l. on September 13, 2012 at 5:33pm

Peggy I wont lie, this weekend is going to be hard.  I hope your family surround you with love and support.  Your son will be glad you were able to be there so focus on that.  Sending you hugs of understanding through the computer.

Comment by Peggy Henry on September 13, 2012 at 4:59pm

today is 3 months since my husband passed.  this weekend is my son's wedding.  the dread of going alone, but folks say you are not alone, well those folks haven't lost their solemate to a surprise attack of cancer.  ya try everyday but everynight your brain works and of course the doubts[ishould have done this or that]  i cannot see the end of the road yet   try as i may  friends run when they see you in case they have to fulfill that empty promise   i'm here for you  ha ha

 

Comment by mercy on September 13, 2012 at 1:48pm

I'm reading some of your posts and its so painful. We could all write each others feelings very eloquently. I understand all your pain and anger and loss of faith. Its been more than 15 months since mom died and almost two years since my brother died and I still feel the same agony and lonliness. I hate life, I just live to care for my baby, nothing else is worth living..I'm sorry that we are all bound by this pain.

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