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Comment by Heath Dorian Papp on June 11, 2015 at 11:01am

There are alternatives.   If you want to make it easier on him, please look up Danny Valdman on FaceBook. Yes, pregrieving is a normal part of the process with losing someone to the c. 

Comment by kathleen akin on June 11, 2015 at 10:44am

this is the one and only place I feel I can speak what's in my heart and know people will understand. 

People are dying all over the place every day...why are we so bad at this?

Comment by dream moon JO B on June 11, 2015 at 8:56am

thnx mary

i no u dnt get over lod i dont u dnt get over loss

or bean told s1 has big c u dnt get ovr shok u dnt 

u shud hear sum of thngs iv bean sayng

susn my mums dgnosz

why not scum bgs it doze bad thng 2 evry 1

why not killlrs

why not peadfiles thy shud be 1st 2 get 

i relze on hear i thng we hav all saed it 

Comment by Mary M. on June 11, 2015 at 7:59am

Jo B - sorry people around you are not more supportive - but sometimes we have to remember that going through a loss personally isn't always easy for others who haven't experienced it to understand. My choice is to walk away from these people -I don't have to justify my feelings to anybody else. Take whatever time, actions you need to deal with the circumstances and losses in your life. God Bless

Comment by dream moon JO B on June 11, 2015 at 12:38am

yea mary yore rht u r

iv bean jdg for my loses probs iv gt nw now

iv bean told its slf pitty or so get ovr get overr it iv bean told i wish pepel wear mre unstand insted of hav ago at us all tim i do

Comment by Mary M. on June 10, 2015 at 7:04pm

Kathleen -my heart goes out to you - I think a part of all of us starts grieving once a limit is put on one's life span. As Richard said - you are not alone here there are people who have gone through, or are going through, emotions similar to what you are feeling. Feel free to vent here anytime - it helps - doesn't change the circumstance other than you not having everything bottled up inside. I think it's healthy to vent . Here there is no judgement just empathy and understanding.

Comment by dream moon JO B on June 10, 2015 at 2:48pm

i juts hop she can beat i do 

Comment by dream moon JO B on June 10, 2015 at 2:35pm

im so sorrry kathlen

iv bean very mad angeery coz mums bean disnosd wth brest c 

thy say hav cort erly 

but all is all i say is why her i do 

if im rant 2 mush evry 1 im sorry i am

Comment by Richard G on June 10, 2015 at 12:57pm

Kathleen, I started greiving months in advance with my first wife. I wish there was something I could say or do to help ease your pain. But unfortunately there are no words that will make you feel better. Just know that you are not alone. People here completely understand how you feel.

Comment by kathleen akin on June 10, 2015 at 12:43pm

So now Rocky is saying he wants to go off the Nexavar (the chemo he's on) because he wants a quality of life. He was told with treatment he had 6 to 24 months to live. How long without treatment? I'm distraught. I'm mad. I'm depressed. I'm scared out of my wits. There was no discussion, he just decided on his own without taking me into it. What about other treatments? He asked the onocologist about it last time, but it's like the movie Ground Hog Day every time with this guy. It's like he just sits there and asks how is Rocky feeling...and that's it! What about other options Dr? What do you do around here anyway? What are you paid to do? I can't tell.

I'm beside myself with grief. Am I the only one who started grieving beforehand? I feel like that is what I'm doing right now. Preparing myself. At times it's like lets get this over with. Then I stop and think how that would actually look and I can't take it. I can't stop crying no matter where I happen to be. I'm sick of making small talk with people at work...don't they know I'm dying inside? Can't they see it?

How long does he have with no treatment?

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