Hello To All

I have not been online for a while. I am sorry to welcome new members and please know we here online truly understand each other.

I am keeping myself busy. Going back to college and working on my Masters, caring for my 3 year old and staying real close to those few family members who still care. However, at the end of a really dark cold night as I am walking to the college parking lot, feeling overwhelmed with stress, a cold, and a huge headache, I just wished, wished, wished, I can actually have myself believe this: "Amanda its okay, go on and pull yourself up, drive home with happiness, excitement, that Danny will be at home waiting for you along with Sebastian".   My reality is NOTHING like that...

What I am trying to say is that no matter how busy I am getting and my mind occupied at the end of my day I continue to feel empty and still continue to think about my beloved husband every minute of my day. For the past 19 months, I daily have continued to tell myself: "Life was NOT suppose to be this way". Why? Why would someone so evil exist and give him the right to kill, take someone else's life away, for no reason whatsoever, destroy lives, breakup families, leave a toddler without his Dad, brake my heart into pieces, leave my lifeless. Why? Why would God allow such evil people who shows no remorse  still be alive? While my loving, caring, husband and great father be gone?

 

As always, Thank you for reading,

 

Amanda

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Permalink Reply by Dennis C. on November 10, 2012 at 7:10am
I am so sorry for all that you are dealing with. But we can find comfort in what we have to look forward to.

The truth be told, God is not responsible for this, but he does have some wonderful promises that when fulfilled will bring great joy to your heart. Imagine a time when you and your son will be reunited with Danny.

The Bible has accounts of things just like that, and the families were beside themselves with great happiness. (Mark 5:41, 42)

There are wonderful things to hope for in the future, and maybe, if you can learn what these things are, it will give you hope, and purpose. It won't take the pain away today, but it will help you look past today and into a better future.
Permalink Reply by Annette Dominguez on November 14, 2012 at 2:00pm
Hi Amanda, I hope you are doing better. I am still taking things one day at a time. The holidays are coming up and I'm praying that all will be well. Father's day was very hard for me. Every now and then I will see a picture of my husband and it makes me cry because we will not be taking any more pictures of him. I still can't look at the DVD that was played at his funeral. It makes me cry. Write when you get time.

Take care of yourself,
Annette

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