I found this today and it is worth sharing.  I found it validated all of what I have been telling myself and others about letting me do this my way.  I have lived through enough horror in my life I know I needed to trust myself to make the right decisions for me and reading this today was good.  I am going to print a copy off and put it on my fridge.  I hope when you click on the link it takes you to the page written by Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph.D. called Helping yourself heal when your spouse dies.  But it makes sense to me as a mother whos son died in 2010 too. 

http://griefwords.com/index.cgi?action=page&page=articles%2Fhel...

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My mom died 4 months ago

My mom had pulmonary fibrosis. She was sick for a few years. It was funny how when my grandmother smoked, my mom would always say-I’m gonna die from second hand smoke. My mom never smoked. She died from lung disease. Ironic.I was fine at the funeral. Planning. Talking to everyone. I thought u handled it great. Now 4 months later, I’m a mess. Some days I’m perfectly fine, but others I can’t walk down the street without crying. I keep thinking that I haven’t talked to her in a while & I…See More
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My dad was the best human I’ve ever known.
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