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jenny, i am so sorry for the loss of your mom.
i am experiencing same feelings with food. i had posted a discussion similar to yours. i am eating to fill in my emptyness". And like you said, i too turn to food for joy at times and is sometimes the one thing i look forward to doing. As a result, i too have gained weight since my husband's passing. i get nervous and anxious and began eating. i of course are eating all of the wrong foods (sweets, pie, cake) i get joy with eating until i am full. I am trying to fill in my emptyness that i have inside. my emptyness of my heart been broken.
take care,