Comment

Comment by joanne on January 29, 2017 at 3:53pm

Thankyou Morgan, I always find your words soothing, if that makes sense.xx

Comment by Carl accomando on January 28, 2017 at 9:56am

Macy and Morgan, you have described my grief as though you read my mind I at least can find some comfort knowing I'm not alone in this journey I could not put it into words as elequintly as you both have so thank you for expressing the feelings we are all having.

Comment by morgan on January 27, 2017 at 11:38pm

Grief is hard. It takes so much out of us.   Grief is exhausting.  I don't believe it ever goes away.  I've never stuffed down the grief. I've had to let it fly or I would have exploded.  There are no shortcuts.  There is no set time one will feel better.   It is not a sign of weakness or excuse making when you are devastated.  You cant bypass grief or it will make you ill.  t does anyhow without bypassing it.  Grief is complicated.  Grief can be subtle or it can throw you over the cliff.  

I think we get better at dealing with it and we get better at not letting it consume us. I just try to stay as busy as possible and distracted as possible.

I think society pushes for the grieving to make decisions, about everything.  I don't have to do what society thinks I should do.  I only need to do what I consider to be essential.  I've thrown away the rules that say I cant be miserable. If I lose people around me because of it, so be it.  My love was sacred, deep and personal.  So is my grief and no one can judge me for it. 

My energy level for living life has been sorely diminished because grief takes so much energy to endure.  Something big is missing and it is the energy I had because my husband had given me lots of his.  He was always there for me.  It will never be the same. I have just had to resign myself to running on a much lower energy level and sometimes none at all.  Over time I am seeing how similar the consequences of grief are for so many people and the depth of love seems to equate to how hard it is and how long it lasts.  Just a long energy-depleted journey.  Its a true test of endurance against all odds.  Breathing when totally stressed, taking small steps and doing what one can.  I wish for all of us the strength to withstand the worst of it.