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Comment by Leslie maceda on December 14, 2011 at 7:26am

Thanks for all of your support..... Yesterday was 3 weeks since we buried my Mom.... I miss her so much ! I still feel this " ache" in my stomach that won't go away. I know I have to eventually go on with my normal life, but the pain is still so great. I still can't believe that my Mom died. She wasn't even sick --- it makes me angry when I think of that. I want to be a good Mom and wife, but I feel so sad all the time. I feel like I am not living .... My children are only 4 and 6 so they really need me. I am trying. That's all I can do right now.
I can't believe that I will never talk to my Mom again. ( I used to talk to her 3+ times a day) that is really hard for me. I feel so " robbed". This life as I know it now, stinks. I am 43 w/ a great husband, family, two children, and I can't imagine living another 10, 20 years without my Mom. I know a lot of you , say that time will heal, but my cousin died 6 yrs. Ago and my cousin's wife is still grievin terribly. So, maybe some people are stronger than others or maybe they weren't as close to their loved one that passed. I'm not sure.... I just know that I feel like I lost my left arm. My Mom and I were extremely close. This pain is too much some days....

Comment by MIchael A Ballard on December 6, 2011 at 7:29pm

Very sorry for you loss Leslie.  You are in very good company on this site.  

The trauma/shock eventually wears thin, then we realize we have the grief.

And it is so very difficult, but we learn by having to re-learn new ways.

It will somehow be okay, that's what I keep repeating to myself.

Wish you peace of mind and heart,

Michael

Comment by anna l. on December 5, 2011 at 9:41pm

Leslie your journey is just starting and the questions and anger are all part of it.  Unfortunately there is a whole bunch of people here that understand the pain you are in and want the same questions answered.  Getting through each day is a struggle we all work at too.  Im really sorry for your loss.