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Comment by Alin Tooby on March 29, 2016 at 6:02pm

Dear Rose,

 

I am very sorry to hear of your loss. I hope you can find comfort and peace in times of pain grief.  I lost my father last July and was so terribly lost and depressed that I did not feel comfortable existing anymore. While I was starting to get used to being without him, My mother fell into a coma and I just lost her three weeks ago. Its kind of odd because my reaction to losing her was so different then losing my dad.  I loved them both to the moon and back.  They were both equally special and important to me and I feel the holes that have been left in my heart for each of them are the same size.   But for some reason I find that my mothers death is not paining me as much as my fathers did. I miss her dearly and want to badly to be with her just one more time but I am with the thought of her being at rest now. Some have told me that I am conditioned from my fathers passing, others tell me I am numb. I personally feel kinda like you said; satisfied with the fact that I had this woman in my life. I think of how lucky I was to have had her as my mother for 31 years.   Perhaps I am happy that I don’t have to see her suffer from the pain of being without my father.  She was so heart breakingly sad without him. Even more so than I was.   Then again; perhaps I am  just trying to find all the silver linings in this thunderstorm because the pain and weight of the rain in them is just too much to bare. Anyhow. I thought I would share my experience with processing my loses with you.  We all process things differently and perhaps it is a blessing to not be crippled with grief, even if its temporary.  All we can do is take it one day at a time and continue to be happy with the blessings of time that we were given with our dearly departed.

 

With Love and Best Regards,

 

Alin 

Comment by Jason on March 17, 2016 at 7:18pm

I am sorry for your loss.
My wife died 20 days ago and I am a mess.
One thing I have experienced is what I am told is the numb. Where your body cannot handle the emotions, needs a break to help you accomplish things, to help you process.
I do not know if that is what you are feeling. I think I am still in shock.
You sound content and at peace.