It has been a long time since I saw you, a very long time actually. You used to come to me but you don't anymore. It's hard to think that I could ever forget the blood stained walls I came home to that day. You were my very best friend, my sister. He took you from me yet in court he said he thought I was the one he would find there. I live with that everyday. He came in the house that day thinking you would be at tennis and I would be home but we traded days so that I could go out on a "secret" date. You were the good one of the family and I was the "bad apple" our parents say. Wow, I'm SO very sorry my baby sister, I really let you down. I always thought I took care of you but I guess I didn't. If I could go back to that day trust me I would. I go over it in my head everyday. I would gladly have gone home even if I knew what was going to happen I would do it. There's not even a second of a thought about that. I would have given my life for yours any day. I always wondered why when he walked through the door and realized it wasn't me he didn't just walk out. I was granted permission to see him in prison and he told me that once he went in there was no going back. He stared at me like he still wanted to kill me. He was scary. He said it just got out of control. He also never once said I'm sorry, and as I was leaving he said hey hope to see you again soon baby. What he did to you and your poor body still just horrifies me. I still remember like it was yesterday walking into the house and there was just blood everywhere. I picked you up and held you because I guess I knew you were way past gone by the look of your body, and of course I was young too. He had just ripped you apart. The police actually had to fight me physically to get me away from you. I don't understand why it wasn't me. I just know that you are gone and I'm alone. I miss you so very much. I love you little sis...please come back to see me in my dreams again, I miss you so very much...I need you...