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Comment by Chris on February 8, 2017 at 4:30pm

what would dad do?  I like it.  thank you.  I have been crying less this past week and when I do start, I'm able to stop sooner.  I guess that's progress, but my type A sis is driving me nuts.  we're trying to sell his house and all that happens with that kind of business.  I just can't bring myself to walk into his house.  there's blood stains on the carpet from his copd coughing.  my hubby removed the Christmas tree in December while I sat in the car sobbing.  since then I haven't been back.  my brother cleaned and removed stuff.   thank God my dad had very little clutter.  they seem so much stronger than me.  I used to be strong.  I don't know what happened.  the older I get, the weaker I get.  i'm glad I found this forum.  i'm grateful to be able to tell strangers how I feel lol.  no one talks about anything of substance in my life.  just business as usual.  someone bumped into me this morning and I spilled my coffee all down the front of a cream colored blouse I was wearing.  I was so self conscience about it but I really don't think anyone noticed.  nobody even looks at anyone today, let alone has a meaningful conversation 

Comment by Jenn on February 7, 2017 at 4:00pm

that's awful. triggers like that are so sudden and are caused by the most random things. my dad died on a trip abroad and the other day I found an envelope with his handwriting on it. it was a reminder to himself to make a doctor's appointment after his trip that read "DO THIS WHEN I GET BACK." I had a decent amount of energy beforehand but after seeing that I just crumbled.

But you're right. The positive influence they've had on us is one we get to keep forever. One thing that helps guide me is thinking what my dad would advise me to do in any given situation. even if I can't hear it myself, it makes me feel like whatever I do, if I do it with him in mind, it's the right decision.

Comment by Chris on February 6, 2017 at 5:16pm

i'm sorry for your loss too :( we had the opportunity to have good dads.  I hate not knowing when something is going to trigger a crying episode.  it's usually the silliest things like last week I got water down my throat the wrong way in the shower and started sputtering.  then thoughts of my dad at the end when he couldn't breath well and had a hard time taking a shower.  he was too proud to let his daughters help him

Comment by Jenn on February 4, 2017 at 9:13pm

I'm sorry you're going through this. This has happened to me recently. I've been moving into a new stage in my career and have always asked my Dad for advice, now more than ever. Now he's gone. The other day I had some bad luck and didn't know what to do and all I wanted was to call my Dad because he would have known what to do.