Please, please, please!! Why won't  any one help me?? The 20th of this month  is the one year anniversary  of my Jamey being taken  from us, and he still doesn't  have  a  headstone. I have done everything  I  can  but I  admit that I  can't  do it alone. The one I have picked for him and made the non-refundable  down payment is beautiful. It has a picture of him in cameo with a waterfall on black granite. Yes, it's expensive, but why would I give him some cheap thing that just says there's …

The sadness just keeps getting worse. My son, Jamey, was an organ donor. I know that 3 men in their 50s received his gifts. To be absolutely honest, I was not happy to find out that they were in their 50s because I thought he would have wanted to give a younger person a chance for longer life. But, 2 of the men who were recipeints wrote me letters. I am in my fifties and hope like we all do that we are going to be around until we are in our 100s. After the letters, I'm pretty sure Jamey…

What I have laying so heavy on me today is this...why won't churches do more to help their community. I am angry and I will be angry for an unknown amount of time. I can't keep it to myself or I feel like I'm going to explode. But, I have asked several "friends" of mine to ask their churches to help me raise the money for Jameys headstone. They can raise money for a trip to Disneyworld or for the pastor a new car or a vacation trip for the congregation because it's exhausting being a…

I'm wondering why bother with calling out the name of an all seeing, all doing creature that would steal the life of a child and then tell us it was Mr. High and Mightys plan to begin with!  I'm so pissed off right now! We throw people in the deepest darkest hole we can find if they have killed anyone. But this great big wonderful loving monster is thanked every day for his miracles. Even when he's the one that did the killing. How does that make sense? If "he" has a plan for everyone, the…

Today I think I'm about to break into a billion shattered pieces. I'm having panic attacks, I want to scream, I need someone to talk to. And I can't do any of it. Where are the people who say they love me? I guess they are tired of hearing me crying every single day over my son. They want me to move on, get back to normal and talk about how beautiful the weather has become. I want to rip the hair from my head because maybe that pain will ease the pain my sould is going through. My son, me…