rugena monholland
  • Female
  • Twentynine Palms, CA
  • United States
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About Me:
I am 68 years young this September 1st. I am the oldest of 6 children. I have red hair, 7 children,21 grandkids and a dozen or so greatgrand children. I am divorce from an abusive marriage. I live with my youngest daughter.
About my Loss:
MY parents were murdered, March 15, 2012 in Tulsa Okahoma. The man broke into their home at midnight, beat and robbed my father to the point of death, and my mother was beaten, and raped to death. Only one man is serving time for this crime and will not give up the others involved. My sister always checked on them every day and found them. I got the call that afternoon here in California..Nightmares never go away and I have been in therapy for 3 years...It is still like it was yesterday and I cannot even see mom and dad in my mind without seeing how they must have looked that terrible day.. My dad died 7 weeks later of a broken heart, although he had a broken jaw, broken arm beebies shot into his mouth, chest and head, and a knife slash in is chest. He was 92, a wwII vet with honors from the 101st airborne, mom was 85 and a homemaker and quilt maker. They had been married for 65 years after only knowing each other for 2 days. They knew their attackers who lived down the street..Their lives were stolen from them and for some reason..I feel responsible because I am the oldest and should have been there to protect them... Memories of my childhood are gone and only that terrible day keeps playing in my mind like a black and white horror movie and I am afraid to be alone in the dark and see shadows at my bedroom door after all this time. I miss them, their voices, their laughter and sharing stories with mom and sharing a dr.pepper with my dad..This is not going away.

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Grandma sewing room

So I am almost done with cleaning my grandmas sewing room that wasn’t touched in 10 years because of all the mess, but now that she passed away 2 days ago, I don’t know if I should continue, I wanna finish what I started but I don’t know what to do, my grandpa is still alive and I don’t want to leave this burden on him.See More
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