catherine
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  • ontario
  • Canada
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About Me:
Mother of 6 children. I try as much as I can to keep my faith alive for my children. All my children are grown except for one. I just want one normal day without the pain and agony of knowing I have to go one without my oldest and their father. I have no family that has gone through something so tragic so they assume I am just to move on. Its very hard for me to express my feelings to my family since everything should be just hush hush. I am looking for someone out their who doesn't care what I say and a shoulder to cry on cause I am so alone with this horrible sickened grief...He will be forever 16!
About my Loss:
My first true love of my life was my first born son Brett. Man I never knew love would be so grand. My best friend and side kick. He was so much like me as for adventure. We were racing on ATVs and he lost control and hit a tree. As he hit the tree he flew in the air and as a freak accident his strap under his chin caught onto a tree branch, ripped his helmet off, he flew about 10 feet in the air came down against a tree and split his head open. Laid out on the ground could not move, he was completely knock out. My daughter ran for him cause I was in such shock I could not move and hate myself everyday for it. AS tiny as she is she picked him up tried to walk him to the road and all he said was mom and I still couldn't move. That was it he died from head injury...that was it...Their dad was so hurt with his death it made him so sick of depression he died 4 years after from Cancer...and that was my second love who treated me like a Queen a great respectful man that will never be here to care for me and our children cause all he wanted was to be with our son...So here I am not looking for person with a similar story just someone who knows what the true meaning of heart ache is...I feel like such a fake trying to make everyone happy when no one NOT on person has even asked how are you really feeling?

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Grandma sewing room

So I am almost done with cleaning my grandmas sewing room that wasn’t touched in 10 years because of all the mess, but now that she passed away 2 days ago, I don’t know if I should continue, I wanna finish what I started but I don’t know what to do, my grandpa is still alive and I don’t want to leave this burden on him.See More
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