Stacy Greene
  • Female
  • Walnut Creek, CA
  • United States
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About Me:
I am a 44 year old woman who was in a relationship with my boyfriend for over 22 years. Although had lived together for 10+ years, we had gone through a rough patch and we had not lived together for the past two years.
About my Loss:
On March 2, I became worried when I had not heard from my boyfriend. We spoke every day by phone, and he had not returned my calls from the night before. I thought that he possibly had gone up to his family's cabin, and forgotten his cell phone (he'd done this before). But when I called the cabin and also e-mailed him, and still had no response I grew worried and drove to his house. I just wanted to verify that all the things he usually took to the cabin were gone, and that he had indeed left his cell phone. Instead I found him on the porch, dead from sudden cardiac death that he'd suffered the night before.

I am devastated. I have held it together these past weeks planning his memorial and attending a second memorial thrown by several clubs he belonged to yesterday. Also, I have gone back to work. The distractions have helped me get through the days, but today, after the second memorial service, I am hit very very hard with the reality of my loss. I am so very very sad, and miss him so much.

I lost my parents when I was 15 (father - cancer) and 40 (mother - infection she couldn't fight off due to compromised immune system from chemo/radiation) this sudden loss has me experiencing such a deep grief. I feel so lost, and I'm tired of trying to be strong and responsible.

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