Michael DeCarli
  • Male
  • Pensacola, FL
  • United States
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About Me:
I'm 21 and a K9 Handler in the US Navy. I lost my 13 year old sister when I was 11 and at the time I didn't grieve, I think because I was too young to really understand but now I miss her with my whole heart.
About my Loss:
Hello. My name is Michael DeCarli I'm 21 and a K9 Handler in the US Navy. When I was 11 my older sister Jaclyn who was 13 passed away of pneumonia. I miss her so much. Every day I think of how unfair it is that I have been able to live longer than her and I just want to die because it isn't fair. I want to see her and hug her again and I am hurting so bad. I am terrified absolutely terrified that there isn't an afterlife or heaven because that means my beautiful sister is just unconscious and dead for all eternity and she doesn't deserve it. The only reason I haven't killed myself is because I still have barely enough faith in God to think he must have some sort of plan for me and a reason for all this pain but every day I get closer and closer to just trying to end it. I miss her so much.

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Grandma sewing room

So I am almost done with cleaning my grandmas sewing room that wasn’t touched in 10 years because of all the mess, but now that she passed away 2 days ago, I don’t know if I should continue, I wanna finish what I started but I don’t know what to do, my grandpa is still alive and I don’t want to leave this burden on him.See More
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