Marcia Jan McGinnis
  • Female
  • Modesto, CA
  • United States
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About Me:
I am 58 year old Christian woman, mother of one daughter, sister, friend to many, and deeply sad . For the most part I keep my grief hidden, at least to those outside my home. My family was made up of such loving people who loved being together, especially at holidays. I deeply want to restore the joy I used to have. I used to be athletic in my younger years, enjoy the out of doors, music, the beach. I am most peaceful at the ocean.
About my Loss:
It was a summer morning when the call came. Mom said she had fallen and hit her head and thought she should be seen by a doctor.She had been giving her patio flowers water before heading to the mall to buy birthday gifts for her granddaughters. I rushed over, to find mom very much together, with an ice pack on her face near her temple. At the hospital we were told that she had a blood clot as a result of the fall. She needed immediate surgery. She asked to be transferred to Stanford University so as to have the best medical help possible, but there was no time, if she was to survive. My mom was a vibrant, fun loving, caring person to many, mom, grandma, and my best friend. How could this happen ? After surgery she was back to new. But within twenty-four hours everything changed. Next came another surgery, ICU, a brief rehab hospital stay, home care and after six months of giving all I had ,finally Hospice. After sitting by her bedside for forty-five days and nights at the Hospice House being told her death would happen any minute, it came, only minutes after I had stepped away from her bed after being awake with her all night. I was the main decision maker throughout the entire ordeal. The guilt is unmanageable. I miss my best friend more than I miss a mother. The pain is so deep. I am an otherwise strong person and have endured tradgey before, but this is completely new territory. This is our third Christmas without her .

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Latest Activity

david karpe posted a status
"I'm wondering if Myrna is well. Happy new year to Myrna and everybody."
Jan 15
david karpe is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Jan 15
Sasha Moshko posted a discussion

My Fathers Loss

Many years ago, I lost my father after his battle with colon cancer that later spread to his bones. The grief stayed with me longer than I expected. Ambrosia Behavioral Health helped me work through that loss, understand my emotions, and find healthier ways to cope and move forward.Β https://www.ambrosiatc.comSee More
Jan 14
Sasha Moshko left a comment for Sasha Moshko
"Professional help gives you a safe space to talk, understand your emotions, and learn healthy ways to cope. It can make grief feel less overwhelming and easier to manage over time.Β https://www.ambrosiatc.com"
Jan 14
MELANIE WALENDOWSKY BAKER is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Jan 14
Krystal Swinehart joined Jodi Denton's group
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Traumatic loss of an only child

I started this group so that people who have lost their only child or the only child that remained, as in my case, could come together because I believe people that did have a child or children who now have none have special issues.
Jan 12
Krystal Swinehart joined Dayna's group
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Loss of a loved one to alcohol, substance abuse or suicide

If you have lost a loved one to alcohol, substance abuse or suicide please share your story or feelings here. Share the love and beauty of the one you lost. Losing someone any of these ways is not natural and can be hard to understand and ask why? I lost my Mother to an overdose 9 years ago. She also suffered from major depression. Her doctor got her hooked on pain medication and she was addicted most of my life. These doctors who were suppose to help her ended up killing her in the end. I also…See More
Jan 12
Karen R. replied to Entony's discussion Movies about grief that actually understand loss — any recommendations?
"So sorry!πŸ’”πŸ’”πŸ’”πŸ’”πŸ’”"
Jan 2

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