Lisa R. Dietz
  • Female
  • Minneapolis, MN
  • United States
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About Me:
I am 55 and I live in a suburb of Minneapolis Minnesota. I am disabled due to a Traumatic brain injury (TBI) in 2005. Before that, I owned a small business providing end- user training for SAP SOFTWARE s. I was also a writer my whole life, publishing books and articles. After the TBI, I became a fiber artist and watercolor painter. I greatly enjoy any time i can spend with my only grandson, Noah who just turned 13.

We like to watch old movies, ride bikes, play with Legos, watch the new games he makes in a PC program, build forts and talk about his father and how strange the world is. After he leaves I write down what he imagined and the world's he created, etc., So that one day his children will see how cool he is.
About my Loss:
On January 6, 2013, my son, Eric (or Eroz as they called him there), was at Kehena Beach in Hawaii when a big storm suddenly came through. A friend of his appeared to be in trouble and being a good swimmer, he dove into the churning waters to help him. Before he reached him, a rip tide came up and carried him out to sea. Others tried to get to him and to alert the Coast Guard but the seas were rough and it was a difficult place to get to. They could not make it in time and so he drowned at the age of 29, my only child, leaving behind his only son. They never found his body and so we have no gravesite or even an urn of ashes. Being disabled, I haven't even been able to put together funds to go with his son where he died. In Hawaii, they don't release a death certificate for 6 years after a missing persons, preventing his son from collection SSI.

Of course we know he is not actually there, but we long for a sense closure. Family-wise, we are very, very isolated and while I have the willingness to feel and grieve and do the work, it is difficult because I am so far from his friends and acquaintances. I long to have people I can talk to about his life not just death because he was an amazing beautiful sensitive and gifted man, generous to a fault. He deserves to be celebrated!
Are You a Service Provider? If Yes, please tell us about your service.
Sort of, I run a website called www.dbtselfhelp.com. DBT is a cognitive therapy program begun by Marsha Lineman in the 1990's. As I understand it, she was a student of Eastern philosophies like Buddhism and as a psychotherapist, imagined how helpful the principles could be, especially to those suffering with Borderline Personality Disorder. With amazing alacrity and success, she managed to convert many of these Eastern principles into this thetapy, removing the religious implications and placing it in accepable, quantifiable Western psychological terminology.

For my part, I am merely one of the many participants in a DBT group -someone whom professionals would refer to as a "
"consumer" (ever so unceremoniously). In fact my initial exposure to DBT was in the "Crisis Unit" of a 6-month Commitment to a State Mental Institution. However. It was the first experiment of using DBT as the only form of treatment, and I found such an immersion to be life changing. I was never again hospitalized after I got out in 2000.

In 2001, after much discussion in an online listserve, I began this DBTSelfHelp website because at the time there was no way for a DBT graduate to get more information or resources about DBT.

I began the website as a website of PEERS TALKING TO PEERS ONLY. I made it clear that I was not a pro and couldn't give advice. All I could do is talk about my experience and provide a place for others to do the same. Over time, some professionals have also contributed and the site has grown. It fluctuates between 500 - 700 pages.

Thus, going back to the original question of whether or not I am a service provider, I do provide a service, but I have no professional qualifications.

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My mom died 4 months ago

My mom had pulmonary fibrosis. She was sick for a few years. It was funny how when my grandmother smoked, my mom would always say-I’m gonna die from second hand smoke. My mom never smoked. She died from lung disease. Ironic.I was fine at the funeral. Planning. Talking to everyone. I thought u handled it great. Now 4 months later, I’m a mess. Some days I’m perfectly fine, but others I can’t walk down the street without crying. I keep thinking that I haven’t talked to her in a while & I…See More
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My dad was the best human I’ve ever known.
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