Chris
  • Female
  • Arlington, WA
  • United States
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About my Loss:
Lost my friend- she'd been clean and sober for 7 years- a wonderful mentor and counselor to others where she lived.She had been deeply involved in the church. We were thinking of having her move in with me, and then scheduling conflicts occurred, couldn't get a hold of her. No phone calls, I couldn't reach her VM (not set up), and I'd receive texts only, ...I asked her to please call me as I really needed to hear her voice before going forward with plans.. I was concerned/worried about her. I believe I received the last text from her -she sent it at 3 in the morning. She was found dead in her room the next day. I wish to God I had read her text- it said, 'Oh friend, I messed up', but I didn't text back until noon. She was living in a clean and sober house, but she never wanted me to see it or know where it was, possibly ashamed. I know she was doing very good for 7 years. Why didn't I just get in her face and say I know you need help? She had such pride, and I was afraid to make her feel bad by assuming such a thing..My text was kind and positive, asking that she not beat herself up by human mistakes that we all make, and to please call me, but I'm concerned she was gone by the time I sent it.Yes. Guilt. Such guilt.

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