Hi Carole

I am so sorry to hear about your sister. I lost my older sister, unexpectedly 6 years ago. I mentioned to another member this morning that your (and hers) loss is still very new and very fresh. My sister and I were very close and ours lives were closely intertwined so when I lost her I almost felt like I needed to start over. She was also my only sibling.

What helped most was allowing myself to experience whatever emotion I felt that day, whether it be crying, laughing (and allowing myself to laugh guilt-free) or just wanting to spend the day in bed and saying to people "sorry, I'm not good company today". After a couple of months I joined a support group, which was great, as it allows you to speak in a completely space space.

I also got myself a notebook and I started writing in it, writing about how I was feeling, writing about silly little sayings or things my sister did (I was worried I may forget them), poems and songs that touched me.

Know that the longing for your loved one will never go away but as days go by remembering your memories, looking at pictures, watching videos will become sweet solace and not as painful as in the beginning. The good days will become more and more and the gaps between bad days will become longer and longer but not gone completely.

Please feel free to reach out to me should you want to chat anytime. It always helps having someone who can relate.

Take care

Nicky