Allison
  • Female
  • Montréal, Québec
  • Canada
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About Me:
i'm on the brink of depression.
About my Loss:
My grandmother and i are so close. she lives right next to me and i'm at her place maybe twice a day. thats where i escape , she's my paradise... i dont need to think about anything negative. A year ago she was diagnosed with lung cancer, i figured it out by myself. i knew what was going on and finally i sat her down and asked. today i told her that i might have some kind closure, and i accept that she wont live forever. she told me she might only live to September. i was wrong and now i'm crushed. i always thought that loosing grandmother would be the least amount of pain emotionally for anyone.. i thought it wasnt that much of a big deal. Brenda isnt my birth grandmother, she began babysiting me when i was 1. we grew closer and closer, now i introduce her as my grandmother and she introduces me as her granddaughter. She is the only kind of grandmother i have. One of my grandmothers died when my mother was younger, the other when i was 5 months.
I can't take it knowing she could die any day. its hard for me to make the best of one day knowing that it could be her last.

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Grandma sewing room

So I am almost done with cleaning my grandmas sewing room that wasn’t touched in 10 years because of all the mess, but now that she passed away 2 days ago, I don’t know if I should continue, I wanna finish what I started but I don’t know what to do, my grandpa is still alive and I don’t want to leave this burden on him.See More
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