Hi bluebell I'm so sorry about what happened. This will be the first Christmas without my mom too but you can get through this. I know it's hard but I know you can get through it. Stay strong. She's watching over you and she's in a better place now out of pain. Hugs <3

Bluebell, your post is identical to my feelings and I'm sure others. I try to stay extra busy, distracted so I don't think about my loss. But as you say, grief always catches up. It caught up with me at 2am this morning and I couldn't go back to sleep right away. It caught up with me again while I was sitting in my office at work, it caught up with me again while I'm in my car driving home. My heart is broken too and I don't think anything can fix that.

I hope you find the purpose you are seeking. I haven't found it yet.

You may be on the other side of the country but I know that a prayer can reach that far. God Bless you.