Thank you Esther. It was indeed support to be beautiful. We had looked so forward to the move and getting settled. God had this all planned for us. My husband getting me to my youngest daughter, the selling of our home, and then getting things put away not to clutter my daughters home. We enjoyed a day of relaxing and the following day the walls came tumbling in on us, sorta speak. Within 3 months he was gone. My whole life change in such a devastating way. Now I have to ask myself? What is the new normal? I want the old normal, just to turn back time for a little while. Of course I would never want my husband to ever have to go thru any of that again no matter how bad I want him back. I have not had a chance to read your blog but plan to after this reply. Again Thank you for the nice reply.

Welcome to the group. I read your story. It is so hard to talk about what the cruel, evil monster "cancer" has done to our loved one and what we were left with during and afterwards. It just doesn't seem fair that horrible things could happen to such good people. People say to me all the time "Joe did not deserve this." I totally agree 100%. But neither did Jesus. But I do have comfort in know that Jesus was holding my husband in his times of need. I found feathers in our bed before and after my husbands death. I even ask my husband, babe where are these feathers coming from? I said are you getting your wings, joking to keep things lite but I really didn't know how spot on I was.