Hi Linda,

I can certainly relate. I haven't felt like going out for the past 2 days and it's the first time in my life that I stayed in especially as it was sunny for 2 miraculous days here on the 'wet coast', which has 'likwid sUNshine for 200 days of the year..as I usually go out riding my bicycle for an hour or two. So, Be Kind to Yourself and Do Whatever you feel like doing or not. I stayed in bed for half of both days sleeping whenever I felt tired, 'escaped' via 'warcraft' and then ate left overs which I really enjoyed thanks to my Best Friend's kindness. She also lost her Father 2 months before me and also lost her mother and brother 10 years ago. It's Good to have a True Friend you can meet or even phone. I wish you well. Be Good to Yourself. Healing is a slow process. Thinking of things I'm Grateful for such as clean water, a roof, bed, tv, etc instead of dwelling on the negatives (unemployment, my 'family' never calling, etc) helps alot as well. Sending you Positive Rays of Hope. John

Hi Linda,

Our loss is great and how we choose to deal with it is our bussiness.  I too cry alone, I like it better that way. I think of it now as the time that I spend with Sarah. She is and was a part of my daily life. She lives on in my heart, I talk with her about how hard life is without her and tell her I miss her. The hard part is moving past the overwhelming sadness that I feel. I hear others talk about daily life and I  just want to scream at them. Tell them whatever silly little thing is nothing in comparison to the loss of my Sarah.  Its hard for me to even watch television, what is happening on the Jersey Shore is of no consequence to my life right now. 

I am learning that grief is a private thing, there is nothing that anyone can say that will make you feel better.  Expectations lead to resentments . so as long as I expect nothing from anyone and realize this is my pain the easier my relationships with them become.  I am sure that your husband has dealt with the loss of your sister in his own way.  Many of my friends are waiting for me to call them as they dont know what to say to me.  As I said earlier there is nothing that they can say to make Sarah come back or make my pain any less,

I check my e-mail twice a day and I am here too listen to anything you would like to share. (((((((HUGS))))))