Janet Hartford

Female

Temperance, MI

United States

Profile Information:

About Me:
I am 55 yrs old. I lost the man I loved and have never been the same. It has been 8 yrs. After he died, I put myself back in school. I now hold a B.A in Family Life Education. It has been a difficult road but I was so blessed to be married to him and the mother of our 2 beautiful children.
About my Loss:
I lost my husband suddenly while he and I were coming back from a fishing trip. We were married almost 23 yrs, We have two beautiful children, ages 17 and 20 when he died. He fell into Lake Erie. I was able to retrieve him and he was still alive, (had a massive heart attack) He was bleeding quite a bit from hitting the boat after falling in. I assured him he would be ok as I continued to scream for help. I tried to get him up out of water, to no avail, I was not strong enough. He looked up at me and said, "I have no more energy and went into another massive heart attack." I continued to keep him up above water until finally (seemed like eternity) someone heard my screams and call 911. Today, I live with guilt and the whys..

Comment Wall:

  • Patricia J. Jones

    Janet~welcome to this grief site.  I lost my husband on December 3, 2010.  I'm just coming out of the "I'm in total shock phase."  The reality of life alone (without my husband) is now setting in.  What a story you have to tell.  It sounds as if you went through in one day what I went through in 3 years caring for my husband while he waited for a heart transplant.  I ask myself why all the time.  Why did we go through three years of hell on earth for it all to end like it did?  Why did other patients receive heart trasplants and not mine?  Why am I now a widow (I hate that word) at the age of 57 ~ to live the rest of my life without my huband?  You certainly have nothing to feel guilty about.  It sounds like you did everything you could.  There are a lot of amazing people on this site.  We are all going through the same thing.  Our lives will never again be the same.  Please join our group My Soulmate My Best Friend.  Hoping you some peace and happiness.  Pat Jones

    Feb 13, 2011

  • Nancy Gershman

    Janet, thank you for the friend-ing. I got chills reading your story, especially you holding your husband in your arms like that. The weight. The chill. The fear. The screaming. I'm so sorry you had to go through that. But I can tell you one thing I've seen with my own eyes: when a widow or widower's children ask for this story over and over again, they are looking at you as a hero. As real and as heroic as any soldier in battle. That's what I wanted to share with you. Hope we'll speak more. Nancy

    Sep 1, 2012