Marie Carr

Female

North Yorkshire

United Kingdom

Profile Information:

About Me:
I am a mother with three children aged 22,15 and 6years. I have a partner who works full time.
About my Loss:
I have lost my Mum on 10th August 2010 and now I have lost my Dad on 10th April 2011. I have so much love for them both. Although, when I first lost my Mum, I felt it was everyones fault, but I especially felt so much guilt and hated my self for not being with her more, but I couldnt stand to hear her calling out. Now I wish I had but I had thought she would get better and return home. At least my Dad sat with her every day so she was never really alone. He loved her so much I miss him so much and am glad we regained our closeness.

Comment Wall:

  • Rachel Lynn Schuler

    hi Marie....I actually feel worse at night....I will just lay there and think of her and cry and cry and cry, and the tears dont stop.....it might be silly, but I hold this teddy bear she had, even though I am older, but somehow it gets me through, I do that when I try to sleep....somehow you have to find peace Marie.....your father may not have done the right thing, but if your mom was that sick, she needed to go....you dont know whether the colostomy bag could have made a difference or not sweetie.....please try and let it go, its not easy, but, feeling guilty doesnt help things, even though you do, and your mom would not want that for you....I wish you peace, always :)

    Jan 30, 2011

  • Rachel Lynn Schuler

    to help cheer you....your friend, Rachel

    Jan 30, 2011

  • Rose Sonenthal

    Hi Marie,

     

    Thank you so much for your kind words. Some days are sort of better but really every day is a struggle. I want me boyfriend back! I want to wake up from this nightmare!

     

    Does it ever get better?

    Feb 2, 2011

  • Kirstine Rushing

    Sorry for my late reply. I rarely check this website. I am sorry to hear you lost your mom too. It is the worst thing that could have ever happened to me. My mom was my  best friend and always will be. I had a weird step dad who didn't treat my mom the way I wanted her to be treated so I can kinda understand where you are coming from on your Dad not following your mom's wishes. I am so sorry. I cry all the time and then cry some more and sadly it doesn't get any easier. I can say though every now and then a breeze will brush past me and I can smell her scent. I know she is with me always and trying to remind me of that, but I just wish I had her back here and things were back to normal. She was only 55!

    Feb 27, 2011

  • Rachel Lynn Schuler

    I also have a blanket of hers that i cuddle with, she used it all the time....I have alot of things that keep me close to her....she was a painter, so I have all her paintings in my bedroom hung up....its a tribute....man I loved her so....her birthday is in 3 days

    Mar 3, 2011