I ask for help! and learn how to live without him?

How do I live without him? If I have never been without him!. I lost my husband on April 28, 2011. He was shot and killed by a complete stranger over a parking space. I am 27 years old and have a 2 year old son. My husband and I have known each other since I was 14 years old. He was my first love, my first everything. I trully imagined spending the rest of our lives together. And growing old. I never imagined that we will ever divorce. Our love was really strong!.  I just recently came across a letter I wrote to him back in 1999, when I was just 15 years old, I wrote to him and told him "I love you so much that I will never be able to live without you"... Tears come to my eyes, as I am now facing that awful "fear" of LIVING WITHOUT HIM".  How do I do this? . I miss my husband so very much. I pray every night, that he himself, helps me to "learn how to live without him".

 

Thank you ladies for reading.

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Permalink Reply by Stephanie Legge on August 9, 2011 at 7:01am
I do the same thing every night plus, write in my journal to him.  The pain is so overwhelming.  I lost my husband on June 27, 2011 to cardiac arrest at home.  There really are no words but, what everyone seems to say try to live day by day and sometimes minute to minute.  I have the little notes I written to him on my fridge from that week before I lost him they are little comfort but, they do remind me that I told him that I loved him and I have no regrets, we lived every day to the fullest but, my heart aches for him.
Permalink Reply by Linda Gutierrez on August 9, 2011 at 9:34am

sounds like we are all on the same page. Lost my husband in Sept.10,of liver disease.i still stay awake as long as i can, in case he comes to me. He has afew times, but,i don't feel any comfort from it. Just more longing for him.He was so sick for so long, and when he does come to me,mostly in dreams, he is well. that brings a smile to my face.but the pain and reality of losing him is unbearable! my life has never been so uncertain.all i'm doin is existing, not living.how do i live without him?

 

 

Permalink Reply by Stephanie Legge on August 10, 2011 at 5:56pm
I have been waiting for my husband to come to me to let me know he is okay but, I guess I am still in too much pain for him to come.  I still can't wrap my head around the fact that he is gone and I keep re-living that night he died which I am not sure why because it's so painful to even think about it.  I miss him so much I don't know how I will live without him.

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