Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Copper "Charlie" on August 31, 2016 at 12:44am

No, you're not alone!!  I'm so sorry to hear about your mother!  It's so hard to sit and wait for it to happen.  THAT by itself can stick you in a fog.  Even knowing it's coming, doesn't prepare you for it actually happening.  You'll like walk around in that fog for a little while.  You brain is trying to protect you from the trauma of her death and likes to put us in foggy states while it does that.  It's just a normal reaction.  Not knowing how to deal anymore...You face one thing at a time...not a list...just one.  Take very baby baby steps.  Just a tiny step to get you through the day.  Some things have to be dealt with immediately and some do not, they just think they do.  Be very kind to yourself.  Don't put a time limit on when you should or should not have reached point A in your grieving process.  There's no time limit.  And if you adopt that belief, it actually makes life easier.  A lady explained it to me as when you have the flu, you lay down, take something, sleep, rest, eat soup or whatever you prefer.  Don't go out and do the lawn.  You kick back and maybe watch a movie or two.  You rest.  But grief effects the body, too.  Your body remembers even when you don't.  And you need to treat grief just like the flu.  Your body needs to rest, too.  And that will eventually help the fog.  I know that's not something everyone can do because of kids, jobs, etc.  But, you can adapt it to take a little time for yourself when YOU can do it. 

I hope this helps a little, and I'm so sorry it's taken so long for a reply to pop up!  I just saw it.

Big Hugz!!

Copper