3 years ago, on July 4th, 2008 I lost my 14 month old son when he was suffocated by his babysitter's husband.  On June 24th of this year I lost my father when he committed suicide.  I guess I'm hoping to find someone that can relate.  I don't know if it's different to lose someone to "natural causes".  I never have before.  I just know that my mind has been a mess these last 2 weeks and 2 days.   I just feel so confused all the time.