Lost and learning life as a single mom...

New to the site, so trying to navigate it properly as well as trying to navigate life as a single mom to our 20 year old son and 10 year old daughter. My husband of 23 years left this earth at the end of October after a traumatic fight against sepsis complicated by Type 2 diabetes.....he left as a double, above the knee amputee with end stage renal disease and untreated endocarditis. He passed without ever understanding the true extent of his illness....but I have PTSD from the severity of the journey which is reminiscent of the 6 years our son fought to survive from congenital heart disease and lost his battle against 11 years ago. There is no pain like losing a child....or so I thought....but when he passed my husband and I were a comfort to each other.....now it is just me forever for these children and on some days I feel like I can't catch my breath or keep moving. I do it for them but not well at all. Hoping to find a way to make it through this nightmare....

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Permalink Reply by Elaine Henderson on December 26, 2015 at 3:15pm
Thank you Anne - the truth is what most of your friends and family don't want to hear and don't know how to respond to. When they ask "how are you?" I know it's because they don't know what else to say and really don't want you to say anything other than - I'm fine - which is not the truth for me these days.
Permalink Reply by Elaine Henderson on December 26, 2015 at 4:00pm
Thank you John - I can not even imagine the trauma you experienced as your wife passed. I am so sorry. It is true for me that so many don't speak of our son who died 11 years ago and in truth I want him to be remembered and talked about because his 6 short years were such a huge part of my life. I find that I am the one who speaks his name and feel I will have to do that with my husband as well because too many people are afraid it will upset me if they mention him. Keeping the kids "gifted" and occupied for Christmas was not the helpful diversion I was hoping it would be and I was completely overwhelmed.

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