I don't understand why I keep getting messages for me to go to my doctor.  He's only a primary care physician and he only writes out prescriptions and orders tests only when I tell him I have a medical problem and when my husband was alive he did the same for him.  He doesn't know anything about what it's like to go through the loss of a spouse. My PCP as a general practioner doesn't know anything about specialized medicine like cancer, grief, stress etc.  He'd write a script for pills and then I'd be left to suffer the side effects and as it is I'm already taking 5 prescriptions for medical problems.  It was my understanding that we must do our 'grief work' and I can't do that when I'm sedated.  I'm sleeping too much as it is. And besides if I die of a broken heart what difference does it make.  My husband is gone and no one is worried about him.  He's in a better place than I am, or so I've been told.
P.S. I would like everyone who replied to my posts that each and every one of you who sent me gifts, hugs, condolences, words of comfort and wisdom, even though I along with everyone here who are in much grief and sorrow, and even though I am so depressed and crying, I am so touched and amazed at your heartfelt compassion.  Besides my grief support meeting at Hospice these grief sites are the only place I can go that you all make me feel so understood and each of you are so  supportive. I read your emails and replies again and again.  You are all so helpful and  I am truly grateful.