Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Nancy Eve on April 7, 2011 at 7:20pm

Robin,

I cried all the time too.  I also felt all kinds of pain.  I went to my doctor and she prescribed some medication for me.  We tried several types and nothing seemed to work.  I couldn't sleep in my bed, and now (9 months later) I still have trouble sleeping.  People tell me it just takes time.  It is better than it was when she first died. After about 4 months I was able to go back to sleeping in my bed.  I think it all just takes time.  Talk to people, Write in here. And don't let anyone tell you it's taking too long or you should be feeling better by now.  It'll take as long as it takes. 

Nancy

 

Nanc

Permalink Reply by Robin Williams on April 8, 2011 at 2:48pm

Thank you for your response- I appreciate it.  I know it takes time.....I have never been known for my patience and this is the first traumatic loss I have experienced.  Hopefully being able to talk to others w/ the similar pain will help.

Permalink Reply by Denise Murphy on April 7, 2011 at 7:39pm

Hi Robin,

I'm so sorry for your loss.  When you have such a sudden loss it can be devastating, not to minimize other losses but when it is so unexpected it shocks you right down to your soul.  I lost my mom and dad they were sick so it was  expected, I lost my 41 year old sister in July 2010 to exactly the way you lost your mom, massive heart attack in her sleep.  She left two beautiful children 9 and 10, we were unaware of a heart problem but she had been going back and forth to the doctor because she felt like something was not right.  The day she died she was scheduled for a stress test which would have diagnosed the problem.  I too had a hard time sleeping for the first few months thinking I could go like that, I went to the doctor for a check-up had my blood tested and everything was fine.  I think it is normal to think about our own mortality when we experience a death ,specially something so sudden there one day gone the next.  I cried for the first few months every day, it has been better since after Christmas but it comes and goes.  Like waves of dispair and then I 'm fine until the next wave hits.  I know this is part of the normal grieving process but it doesn't make it any easier.  Joining a bereavement group might help you it helps to talk about it.  I hope I helped you in some small way. Make sure you get a complete physical so that they rule out anything with your heart. 

God Bless,

Denise

Permalink Reply by Robin Williams on April 8, 2011 at 2:47pm

Thank you so much for your response.  I am also sorry for your losses.  It helps to know that I am not the only one having issues w/ sleep and with death.  I'm glad that you went to the doctor and everything checked out okay.  I hope my doctor will get to the bottom of things.  I know it takes time but when you are mourning and in pain every day it becomes so overwhelming :(