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Comment by Storyas Fawnfeather on February 28, 2012 at 1:46pm

My dad died at the end of April last year, and I think it was October or November before I could go to the grave site.  I felt bad about that, because we are Appalachian, and Appalachians take decorating graves very seriously.  But, I just couldn't.  I felt better after I did go, but I don't know if I would have felt better afterwards if I would have forced myself to go before I was ready.  It took me about three years to go after my mom died, and the only reason I was able to go then was that I went with my dad, because it was important to him.  Had I not had that experience of my dad taking me to my mom's grave, I think it would have taken me three years to get to my dad's grave too.  But, he somehow made it easier for me by leading me there after my mom died.  He gave me the strength to go to their grave (they are lying next to each other now) faster by helping me go to my moms grave.

Comment by christianlee on February 28, 2012 at 1:24pm

I totally share similar feelings. We just now got mom to finish dads headstone......with pictures and wording. She just went with us last month and my dad died in June. Almost like mom wasn't accepting dad passing away and why do we need to go pick out a headstone .

Comment by marie on February 28, 2012 at 12:39pm

My mom sent an email that whenever we wanted to get Daddy's ashes we could. I am not ready yet. I do want to get some and take some to his childhood home and put some at my brother's grave. I just can't do it yet. wonder when I will?

 

Comment by christianlee on February 28, 2012 at 2:46am

Yes. I agree that was not a nice email. A huge loss like your parents..one never gets over. It hurts so much. Our grief and sorrow are ours to own and carry in out hearts. I have a lady at work who keeps saying my smile isn't very happy. What? I just lost my dad last summer. You don't just get over it. I struggle to go to work everyday and be there. People don't understand if they haven't lost a parent. Kind of makes me feel lost.

Comment by Storyas Fawnfeather on February 27, 2012 at 10:50pm

You know - normally the people at my church are pretty supportive.  But, right after church yesterday I got an email from a man who I thought was more than this email made him look like in which he was telling me that whatever we had in life that we had to learn not to complain about it but to realize our responsibility in it and talk positive and move on.  That is a nutshell.  It was pretty horrible.  I am still in shock.  I responded and nicely let him know how wrong he was but part of me feels like telling him off although I know the right thing to do was to handle it nicely like I did.

Comment by Storyas Fawnfeather on February 27, 2012 at 10:47pm

Katie - I know how you feel.  My mom's birthday was last Thursday.  I took flowers of her favorite color to the grave and told her happy birthday.  I also have a present for her that I haven't taken over yet - a candle in her favorite color with an angel topper.  Her favorite color was/is purple.  Maybe it would help if you did that.  My dad died six days before his birthday.  It hasn't been a year yet, but when his birthday comes around in a few months, I'm pretty sure that is going to be really hard since it's the first birthday since he died.  I will say a prayer for you tonight.

Comment by Katie on February 27, 2012 at 9:09pm

Thank you.  I cant wait to go to bed and this day be over!

Comment by christianlee on February 27, 2012 at 7:20pm

So. Sorry Katie ......my dad's bday was in September. First bday that was not so happy. Yes..it was very hard. A sad day.

Comment by Katie on February 27, 2012 at 6:45pm

Today is my dads birthday, he passed away suddenly in October, he would have been 54.  Its so hard to know Ill never be able to tell him happy birthday in person again.  I miss him so much.

Comment by Andrea Clark on February 26, 2012 at 12:37pm

My dad was in the hospital for 3 weeks in ICU before he passed. The unit was on the 6th floor, and we usually took the elevator up. It always made that stupid "ping" sound at each stop. I can't stand that sound anymore. It was ringing in my ears for days after he had passed away. I don't like to go into elevators anymore, either.

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