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Comment by Debra A. Whitemaine on June 3, 2013 at 1:33pm

Gramaokie and LJ,

I'm so sorry for both of your losses.   I couldn't imagine losing 2 loved ones so close together. My heart goes out to both of you. 

 

I try not to put myself thru this but I am already dreading Father's Day as it will be my first one without Dad.  My husband and I usually made plans with Dad for the day.  The past couple years we took him to monster truck shows and he really enjoyed that.  Before we used to go on a motorcycle ride and stop at one of his favorite eating places.  His name was Kermit and many referred to him as "Frog" so I bought a big mylar frog balloon to put on his grave along with a Father's Day balloon.  I will try to focus on the past memories and think about Dad spending  Father's Day with his Dad (passed in 1977) in heaven.  Take care everyone.

Comment by dream moon JO B on May 30, 2013 at 4:05pm

Comment by LJ on May 29, 2013 at 9:57pm

Dear Debra -  I am so sorry for the sudden loss of your dad. I know your heart is breaking. I lost by dad in January - he was 92 and had a short run with cancer so his death was expected. But I grieve for him every day - we were so close and I miss him desperately. My brother was a strong, healthy and vibrant 68 when he died just 3 weeks after my dad from a pulmonary embolism. It was completely sudden and unexpected and shocking so soon after we lost our dad. My brother has a 17 year old daughter who is devastated.  please come onto this page that Diana created any time you need to express your sorrow. There are others here who understand. 

Comment by gramaokie on May 29, 2013 at 5:34pm

Hi Debra:  My sincere sympathy to you for the loss of your father.  Losing a loved one is never easy, but is even worse when it's sudden.  My daddy was 84 and had medical issues.  When we took him to the er it was for a leg pain.  We never expected he would have a seizure, be in a coma 3 days, and die from sepsis.  My brother was found dead 8 weeks earlier.  I agree that it's a pain like no other.  It's been 3 years and I think of them every day and still miss them greatly.  This is a good place to share your pain because everyone here has been through it and understands.  I wish you comfort in your love and memories of your father.  It sounds like he was a special man.

Comment by Debra A. Whitemaine on May 29, 2013 at 4:16pm

Hi Debra,

I am so very sorry for your loss.  My Dad passed suddenly Sept 2012 and I never knew how much it hurt either.  I was Daddy's little girl and I knew it would be tough but I never thought it would be so bad.  Focus on the memories, talk about it and how you feel and honor him in whatever way brings you peace.  Take care.

Comment by dream moon JO B on May 29, 2013 at 3:28pm

so sory abot yore loss debra all i no death sucks 

i lost ,my dad 2012 3rd .3 at 220am it still hurtss now i stil get th usural stuff like get ovr it its easy i no i cant coz ther silly words hrt

i no grief pain is so cruel its worst pain we can hav evr hav in liffe 

Comment by Debra on May 29, 2013 at 3:17pm

My name is Debra. I suddenly lost my father on April 26th due to a collapsed lung and he stopped breathing and was without oxygen at least 5 minutes so he was brain dead. I am totall devastated and still cannot believe this is real. My dad raised 4 kids by himself and his kids and grandkids were his everything. I was very close to him as I was his only girl. I never knew pain like this.

Comment by gramaokie on May 28, 2013 at 12:39am

Monique:  That's a lovely arrangement you made.  I go to the cemetery every week.  It makes me feel closer to my daddy & my brother.  I check on the flowers, keep dirt and grass off the markers, and just make sure everything is okay.  It is my way of paying respect to all that they are to me.

Comment by Debra A. Whitemaine on May 27, 2013 at 1:34pm

Monique,

What a beautiful arrangement you made for your Dad!  Great job.

 

LJ, I can understand how you have a sense of peace now that the headstone has been engraved.  I ordered my Dad's in April and the foundation has been poured and the headstone should be placed by the end of July.  I felt a sense of peace by just getting everything ordered. 

Comment by LJ on May 26, 2013 at 7:41pm

Thursday was my son's graduation, Saturday my daughter's dance recital, and now it is Memorial Day weekend. My dad would have been at every one of these events, proud and happy to be surrounded by family. Today I put new flowers on my parents' graves, and my dad's date of passing is now engraved on the headstone. It gave me a sense of peace to see their names side by side and linked together by heart which holds their wedding date: December 25, 1942. But I still miss my dad so much, every day I long for his presence. 

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