My story is rather long. I will shorten it to say that how I got myself into this situation was simply via one message to an old friend on social media kinda like a hey what have you been up to for so many years. From there, it turned to daily messages, then to texts, then face-time then to in person last spring. I separated he was unhappy in his marriage. He lives a pretty far distance away so it was a long distance emotional and physical affair. He became my best friend. Know one ever saw right through to the heart of me like he did. Then come late 2021 the wife found out. He left it that he need to figure things out. However... what he really did was throw me under the bus and blocked me everywhere. My heart has been completely broken ever since. The pain is like know other. In my mind this was my soulmate. At least I was 95% sure. There has been contact since then but only initiated by me. Last time we spoke for 2 hours was end of April. He could not tell me during that convo that he does not love me. Yet he stays in a marriage with zero kids for security he fears change. I have not smiled fully since his last I love you too in late 2021... just before Thanksgiving. Devastating situation.

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My mom died 4 months ago

My mom had pulmonary fibrosis. She was sick for a few years. It was funny how when my grandmother smoked, my mom would always say-I’m gonna die from second hand smoke. My mom never smoked. She died from lung disease. Ironic.I was fine at the funeral. Planning. Talking to everyone. I thought u handled it great. Now 4 months later, I’m a mess. Some days I’m perfectly fine, but others I can’t walk down the street without crying. I keep thinking that I haven’t talked to her in a while & I…See More
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My dad was the best human I’ve ever known.
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